Popular hobbies and interests change over time and are more a reflection of trends and fashions than an indication of what individuals really want to do in their spare time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#hobbies #interests #change #time #reflection #trends #fashions #indication #individuals

Nowadays, new generations are more addicted to social media trends rather than having their own identity, where we can find young ones following the herd

while

choosing their hobbies

instead

of selecting an activity that they are really interested in. In my opinion, I believe that one should have the preferred hobbies that could live

along with

them and won't fade over time. One of the most famous reasons, that people would be enrolled into a sport or adopt a specific hobby is to get to meet new people or build new friendships,

while

feeling as part of the group not being left behind.

Therefore

, some would join a class or show interest in something just to have new friends. Unfortunately, these activities sometimes are famous because of trends or social media and will fade away with time. Eventually, Ones will lose their identity and will be involved in activities that they don't like just to fit in. On the other side, we should encourage our children from a young age to know their interests and support them to evolve .

Thus

, they can grow into something that they really like and enjoy and have partners that actually have common hobbies rather than fake ones.

Moreover

, when they get to develop a skill from the early beginning, they can have it as a career in the long term and get to work in something that they really enjoy. In conclusion, we shouldn't be dragged into social media trends ,

instead

, we should emphasize our own talents and improve them.

Accordingly

, I strongly recommend that for preschool age we enrol our infants on activities that match their interests.

Submitted by passent_abdelaziz on Mon Oct 09 2023

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task response

The essay demonstrates a good understanding of the prompt and presents relevant ideas. Ensure to develop the main points more extensively.

coherence

The introduction and conclusion are evident, but the essay lacks a clear progression of ideas between paragraphs. Use linking phrases to improve coherence and cohesion.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

277 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Popular hobbies and interests change over time and are more a reflection of trends and fashions than an indication of what individuals really want to do in their spare time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Water pollution has become an increasing problem over the past few decades. What causes water pollution? How can we prevent this problem?

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same thing and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think the best way to motivate and encourage people to work hard is to pay them based on how much they produce and sell. Do you agree or disagree? Include relevant examples from your own experience.