Solving environmental problems should be the responsibility of one international organization rather than each national government. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, all
people
in the world are
aimed
Wrong verb form
aiming
show examples
to increase their income and earn a better life.
Therefore
,
one
of the most common topics for discussion is money and how much of it every person has.
This
idea and its influence on society and human beings will be observed in
this
essay. First
things
first,
it is essential to determine the reasons for
this
tendency. Obviously, it is the most simple way to determine the status of a person. If someone earns much less than
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
show examples
, most likely they will not have a lot in common to discuss.
Besides
, money is
one
of the
things
that we face on
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
everyday basis, and
therefore
, it is common to discuss it.
Moreover
, those who have
a
Change the article
the
show examples
highest income might improve their self-esteem
vie
Correct your spelling
via
show examples
this
discussion. Some might force others to share the information about their salary even if it is under NDA.
This
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
has both positive and negative consequences. On the
one
hand,
this
motivates
people
to work more to get more and
this
benefits them
as well as
economy
Add an article
the economy
show examples
overall
.
On the other hand
, It might cause a problem of the glass ceiling when
people
are forced to stay
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
their current workplace without any possibility of promotion. It might cause
burnouts
Fix the agreement mistake
burnout
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and depression and the job might become impossibly hard.
Furthermore
, research from The Guardian discovered that in some more severe
cases
Add a comma
cases,
show examples
such
long term
Add a hyphen
long-term
show examples
attempts that have no result might force
people
to do grim
things
. In the end, it might be said that all topics should be available for discussion but no
one
should be forced to talk about
things
that they do not like. In my opinion, there are various
things
exept
Correct your spelling
except
money that
well-worth
Correct your spelling
well worth
show examples
to be discussed.
Submitted by dulskywork on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmental degradation
  • nation's jurisdiction
  • international collaboration
  • global response
  • coordinated effort
  • enforcing environmental laws
  • sharing best practices
  • innovations and technologies
  • critical resources and knowledge
  • international agreements
  • equitable distribution
  • accountability
  • oversight
  • local context
What to do next:
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