In the future, the main reason for going to shopping mall will be for entertainment, not to shop. do you agree or disagree?

#future #reason #mall #entertainment #shop

It is sometimes argued that

primary

Correct article usage

the primary

show examples

reason to visit shopping

mall

Fix the agreement mistake

malls

show examples

is for entertainment only . Some

people

believe that the

malls

are for both entertainment and

shop

Wrong verb form

shopping

show examples

This

essay aims to disagree with the above notice and explain why both are important.

To begin

with, It is

undeniable

Correct article usage

an undeniable

show examples

fact that lots of investors are lured to spend money on the

malls

because it attract

alot

Correct your spelling

a lot

of local

people

and tourists as well.

In addition

to that,

malls

are build

Change the verb form

are built

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

recreation

center

Fix the agreement mistake

centers

show examples

nowadays where everyone can enjoy

along with

shopping.

As a result

, it is

irrefutable

Correct article usage

an irrefutable

show examples

fact that investors are creating more than one branch.Nowadays

malls

are built for everyone.

For example

, there are

lot

Correct article usage

a lot

show examples

of games facility for

childrens

Correct your spelling

children

show examples

youngsters

Correct word choice

so youngsters

show examples

can enjoy their leisure time.

In addition

to it, if

people

just want

enjoymement

Correct your spelling

enjoyment

, they can go to amusement

park

Fix the agreement mistake

parks

show examples

garden

Fix the agreement mistake

gardens

show examples

or plazas.

Main

Change the article

The main

show examples

purpose of

malls

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

for shopping only

entertainement

Correct your spelling

entertainment

is just added as cheery on top. If

people

want more enjoyment facilities in

malls

they can look for outdoor facilities.

For example

, there are

lot

Change the article

a lot

show examples

of outdoor facilities like

wild life

Correct your spelling

wildlife

show examples

safari,

wonderland

Correct word choice

and wonderland

show examples

where you get

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

scary rides. In conclusion, having mulled over the aforementioned paragraph

it is clear that

there are thousands of activities

people

can do in the mall.

However

, shopping will always

will

Remove a modal verb

apply

show examples

main

Add an article

the main

show examples

reason to visit

malls

Submitted by rajparul86 on Tue Oct 10 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Ensure that the essay fully addresses the given prompt by discussing both perspectives and providing a clear stance.

coherence cohesion

Organize the essay in a more logical manner by clearly stating the main points and providing supporting evidence.

lexical resource

Use a wider range of vocabulary to enhance the overall quality of the essay.

grammatical range and accuracy

Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to improve clarity and precision.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
24Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

223 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Some people believe that technology has made man more social. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Experts throughout the developing and developed world have debated whether the advent of sophisticated modern technology such as mobile phones, laptops and iPads has helped enhance and improve people's social lives or whether the opposite has become the case. Personally, I strongly advocate the former view. This essay will discuss both sides using examples from the UK government and Oxford University to demonstrate points and prove arguments.
7.5
band
Nowadays, many families have both parents working. Some working parents believe other family members like grandparents can take care of their children, while others think childcare centers provide the best care. Discuss both views, give own opinion.
It is undeniable, that modern living conditions make family members work hard. Children are left with grandparents or stay in the kinder gardens in such situations. In this essay, I will discuss both arguments, as well as my own opinion, which tends to professional baby care in preschools.
7
band
In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?
In some states owning a house is more important than hiring accommodation this is because as a human one of the main things is to fulfil the basic requirements. Such as hose, Food, Clothes and water. On the other hand, renting is money-wasting. Hence I believe this was a constructive circumstance.
7.5
band
Some people say that too much time and resources are spent on the protection of wild animals and birds. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Some people argue that too much time and resources are spent on the protection of wild animals and birds. However, I completely disagree with this viewpoint. The protection of these creatures is not only essential for maintaining the balance of our ecosystem, but also for preserving our cultural heritage and advancing scientific knowledge.
6.5
band
It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinino? What sort of punishments should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behavior to children.
In the life of a man one of the most important things taught by parents is education. In today's ,world it's basic for children to understand what's right and wrong at a young age. In this essay, I will discuss how much I agree with this statement, providing some examples of methods of punishment too.

In the future, the main reason for going to shopping mall will be for entertainment, not to shop. do you agree or disagree?

Your opinion

Some people believe that technology has made man more social. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Nowadays, many families have both parents working. Some working parents believe other family members like grandparents can take care of their children, while others think childcare centers provide the best care. Discuss both views, give own opinion.

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Some people say that too much time and resources are spent on the protection of wild animals and birds. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinino? What sort of punishments should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behavior to children.