some people think that museums should be enjoulyable places to entertain people while others believe that the purpose of museum is to educate people . discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #museums #enjoulyable #places #purpose #museum

Some people argue that

museums

are entertainment

places

while

others believe it is an educational

places

Change the noun form

place

show examples

However

Add a comma

show examples

I am with

museum

Add an article

the museum

a museum

show examples

Change preposition

for

show examples

educational purposes and

this

essay will examine the reason.

To begin

with,

museums

from

the

Correct article usage

show examples

enjoyable

perspectives

Fix the agreement mistake

perspective

show examples

, individuals prefer visiting

museums

to enjoy their time and observe the differences between past and present . In other words, individuals travel abroad to visit

museums

Change preposition

show examples

their vacation because they

found

Wrong verb form

find

show examples

relaxation and they feel inspired .

For instance

, the survey done in 2023 at Sultan Qaboos University showed the number of visitors who visit Oman

museums

yearly

Add a missing verb

show examples

more than 100

thousands

Change to singular

thousand

show examples

Therefore

, it seems logical that

museums

are one of the entertainment

places

On the other hand

museums

from

educational

Add an article

an educational

show examples

perspective, it is the best way to learn

specially

Replace the word

especially

show examples

for students because explaining subjects

likewise

history with visible materials

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

helps to understand the subject better and it gives students

Correct article usage

a cleare

show examples

cleare

Correct your spelling

clear

clearer

idea but, if they study without trip to museum the information in the book is just abstract words .

For example

Add a comma

show examples

according to

Oman TV student understands the Mona Lisa subject more when they see it in

museums

and they know all the details related to

this

painting.

This

means it is a method for studying and the benefits of

museums

for education purposes

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

huge,

To sum up

although

some argue that

museums

Change the verb form

are

show examples

enjoulyable

Correct your spelling

enjoyable

places

because people go there to enjoy their free time. I believe it is educational

due to

the learning trips give the learners all the information that they need and it is a visible method.

Submitted by almqbalimaryam on Tue Oct 10 2023

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coherence cohesion

Improve the introduction and conclusion by stating a clear position and summarizing the main points.

task achievement

Provide more supporting evidence to strengthen the arguments.

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

259 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

entertain
educate
exhibits
interactive displays
artifacts
history
knowledge
learning
entertainment
engaging
enriching
stimulating
inspiring
informative
perspective
appreciation
balance
opinion

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some people think that museums should be enjoulyable places to entertain people while others believe that the purpose of museum is to educate people . discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people believe that air travel should be restricted because it causes serious pollution and will use up the world’s resources. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people feel that high school students should only learn literature from their own country, while others feel that they should be exposed to literature from around the world. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think the main purpose of school is to turn children into good citizens and workers, rather than to benefit them as individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, companies allow people to work from home. In others, people are still expected to work in an office. Dicuss both views and give your own opinion.

Modern technology such as personal computers and the internets have made it possible for many people to do their work from home at least part of their work instead of going to an office everyday. What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of this situation.