The development of science and technology benefit our life. However, scientists cannot find effective solutions to the problems they created. To what degree or disagree with this option?

Although
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technological development has an indispensable impact on our existence, there is a belief that there are some issues scientific individuals and people in the technological field are not able to solve
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
. I adopt the belief that not all
problems
,the world confronts, have the suitable solution. To embark on, there is a
significant
Change the adjective
significantly
show examples
increasing rate
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
air pollution, and the main culprit is exhaust fumes.
In other words
, in
this
contemporary era, there is a notable elevating number of vehicles and an increasing demand for using private commuting vehicles rather than public transportation ones, simultaneously.
Accordingly
, a high level of toxic air has been developed which has detrimental effects on human health.
For example
, a survey carried
by
Change preposition
out by
show examples
a group of Iraqi medical researchers assumed that the number of respiratory diseases
such
as asthma,
where
Correct your spelling
were
show examples
significantly increased
due to
high levels of allergens in the contaminated air. Despite the serious
problems
scientists could not find a healthy and
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
alternative way to diminish the amount of automobile exhaust.
Moreover
,
moder
Correct your spelling
modern
technology has made almost all important facilities easy to access and available for all users,
this
makes a huge number of individuals lead a sedentary lifestyle. To illustrate, numerous people, nowadays, depend completely on modern machines to perform their duties. A prime example of
this
is
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
show examples
, studies have found that around two-thirds of employees prefer to use their cars
instead
of a small walk. According, there is
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
deteriorating
Replace the word
deterioration
show examples
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
the body condition of most of the populations,
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
many of them
are suffering
Wrong verb form
suffer
show examples
from severe physical
problems
such
as cardiovascular disease. Despite
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
serious trials, scientists have not found the most effective treatment that could help
this
generation to get rid
off
Change preposition
of
show examples
their addiction
ton
Correct your spelling
to
show examples
technology and return to the previous way of thinking. In conclusion,
after
this
essay has reiterated the aforementioned
problems
the technologists and researchers have not treated it effectively,yet, I am of the belief that technology has its own demerits that should urgently
address
Wrong verb form
be addressed
show examples
and
tackle
Wrong verb form
tackled
show examples
by the specialists.
Submitted by Drfatima.Abdullah on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Make sure to fully address the given prompt and clearly state your position.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Organize your thoughts and ideas more coherently.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary and aim for more precision in your word choices.
grammatical range and accuracy
Pay attention to grammar and sentence structure to improve clarity and accuracy.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: