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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

#food #drink #products #levels #sugar #health #people
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With growing awareness of food nutrition, consuming a large portion of sugar is harmful to our health. Whether or not increasing the
price
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 of sugary
products
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 could discourage
people
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 from consuming them has become a widely debated topic.
While
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 many believe that it is not an effective method to stop them from taking sugar, others maintain that they should do it. Given that
price
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 is not the main concern and there is freedom of trade, I strongly disagree that it should not be a good way to prevent
people
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 from eating sugary
products
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by
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apply
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just
raising
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to raise
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 the
price
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.   For a start, how much the product costs can be one of the factors that influence your choice to buy it or not, but
this
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 is not the only factor.
According to
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 a study at the University of Hong Kong,
people
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‘s desires can outweigh any reasonable decision. One striking example is that the government increases the
price
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 of cigarettes up to one hundred Hong Kong dollars per pack, but it still can’t reduce the number of smokers. It is obvious that making sugary
products
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 expensive can’t reduce
people
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's consumption.   Equally worth mentioning is that freedom of trade is extremely important to economic development. The manufacturers should not reduce sugar in the product, since it would affect sales.
Thus
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, the government needs to enforce them or pass legislation to execute
this
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 policy. The producer will lose confidence in
further
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 investment in
this
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 area because of the tough policy. Conceivably, we should strike a balance between public health and economic development.   By and large, it may seem that raising the
price
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 of sweet
products
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 could not cut down consumption if
people
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 are already addicted to it. It would only harm the reputation of the country.
Submitted by hopercyhp on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • health problems
  • manufactured food and drink products
  • sugary products
  • excessive sugar consumption
  • discourage
  • promote
  • healthier choices
  • reduce
  • increased taxes
  • fund
  • health education
  • prevention programs
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