Some people think it is important to spend time in developing a successful career while others think it is more importany to spend time with family and friends. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #time #career #importany #friends

Time

is precious and many successful leaders consider it as a gift. Some people work long periods of

time

for their success in their

career

Fix the agreement mistake

careers

show examples

while

others think that spending

time

with family and friends is more important. The following essay will discuss both views and provide my opinion.

Career

growth is happening in a systematic way during a long period of work experience. To touch victory in the

career

ladder one should spend his valuable

time

in a proper manner.

For example

, Jeff Bosons who worked for more than 6 years spent 15 hours daily building his Amazon company into an International firm.

Furthermore

, the success rate of his effort is inspiring for others who are dreaming of building their

career

and using

time

in a strategic way.

On the other hand

, some people are giving more value to spending

time

with their friends and families.

Although

spending

time

with relatives is better,

career

growth will diminish

due to

waste

Correct article usage

the waste

show examples

time

Lifelife

Correct your spelling

Life

becomes more meaningful when people communicate socially with their loved ones. It reduces mental pressures and supports their

further

activities of daily life. In conclusion,

career

growth and success is a slow process

requires

Correct pronoun usage

that requires

show examples

enormous effort and focus for a long period of

time

, and spending

time

with family is

also

significant in human life. I think that the ones who are required to be successful in real life should spend more

time

on their

career

Submitted by devika.mohanan on Sun Oct 15 2023

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Ensure a clear introduction and conclusion in your essay.

lexical resource

Use a wider range of vocabulary and choose words carefully to convey your ideas more effectively.

grammatical range accuracy

Attempt to use more varied grammatical structures and aim for accuracy in sentence structures.

Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

240 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

prioritize
strike a balance
ambitious
dedicated
work-life balance
career-oriented
professional success
financial stability
personal fulfillment
contribute
supportive
cherish
bond
memorable
experience
social connections
commitment
advocate
sacrifice
juggle

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Some people think it is important to spend time in developing a successful career while others think it is more importany to spend time with family and friends. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

the mother and father of the children, who are obese, should be penalised

Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

n some countries young people have little leisure time and under a lot of pressure to work hard in their studies. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

People believe that not all school children have the natural ability to learn new language schools should not force school children to study a foreign language. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In order to learn a language well, we should also learn about the country as well as the cultures and lifestyles of people who speak this language. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?