The pie chart charts below shows the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013
The two pie charts compare the percentage of online shopping sales in New Zealand city for different retail sectors in the years 2003 and 2013.
we can
be see
, that Change the verb form
be seen
the
film/music and books Correct article usage
apply
has
risen in 2013 and the opposite happened with Change the verb form
have
rate
Correct article usage
the rate
to
clothes and travel,Change preposition
of
that is
, it decreased.
First,
in 2003, the percentage of travel was 36%, which fall
to 29%, Wrong verb form
fell
while
also
film/music was 21%, and rose to 33%.
Secondly
, books were 19% and soar
to 22% in 2013, Wrong verb form
soared
while
clothing in the first year was 24% and decline
to 16%.
In Wrong verb form
declined
conclousion
, we see that film/music and books have developed and become preferred by many. Correct your spelling
conclusion
On the other hand
, travel and clothing have become the opposite for most.Submitted by Ethar Ali
on
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 70%.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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