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Band 4

Excessive traffic has made cities unpleasant places to live and work in. For this reason, private cars should be completely banned from city centers. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

#traffic #cities #places #work #reason #cars #city #centers
Traffic jams in cities make individuals that live there have bad
quility
Correct your spelling
quality
 of life. There has been an
arguement
Correct your spelling
argument
 about whether private
viechles
Correct your spelling
vehicles
 should be allowed to drive in
city
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
 or not. In my
openion
Correct your spelling
opinion
, I think
private
Change the adjective
privately
show examples
 owned
cars
 should not be banned from
city
Add an article
the city
show examples
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
. First and
formost
Correct your spelling
foremost
,
personal
Change the adjective
personally
show examples
 owned
cars
 are a lot of
people
's only transportation method.
City
Correct article usage
The city
show examples
center
 usually has much more job
oppertinuties
Correct your spelling
opportunities
 than other areas,
as a result
, a lot of
labors
Replace the word
labourers
show examples
 will choose to
work
 at
city
Correct article usage
the city
show examples
center
 even
they
Correct word choice
though they
show examples
 live far from downtown, so their only
tranportation
Correct your spelling
transportation
 option will be driving by themselves. If they are not allowed to drive their own
viechels
Correct your spelling
vehicles
 to their
work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
show examples
, they may
force
Wrong verb form
be forced
show examples
 to change their job.
Moreover
, if
cars
 are banned from
city
Add an article
the city
show examples
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
, lots of
car
companies
 will
loose
Replace the word
lose
show examples
 a great amount of profit. As long as
cars
 are
bannd
Correct your spelling
banned
 from
city
Add an article
the city
show examples
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
, many
people
 will not choose to
perchase
Correct your spelling
purchase
 a new
car
, especially individuals that live near or around downtown.
People
 stop buying
cars
 that can gain profit for
car
companies
,
in
Correct word choice
and in
show examples
 the end, some
companies
 may
layoff
Correct your spelling
lay off
show examples
 some of their employees.
On the other hand
,
banned
Wrong verb form
banning
show examples
viechles
Correct your spelling
echoes
 from
city
Add an article
the city
show examples
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 is the most
efficent
Correct your spelling
efficient
 way to improve the excessive traffic problem. But
this
 method may cause a lot of side affect like I just mentioned, and there are many
alternetive
Correct your spelling
alternative
solution
Change to a plural noun
solutions
show examples
 like
improve
Wrong verb form
improving
show examples
 public transportation system and road
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
show examples
 that can
also
 solve the
provlem
Correct your spelling
problem
 but
not
Add a missing verb
are not
show examples
 that harsh.
To sum up
, if private
cars
 are banned from
city
Correct article usage
the city
show examples
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 lots of
people
 may have
hard
Add an article
a hard
show examples
 time
to go
Change the verb form
going
show examples
 to
work
, and some
people
work
Correct pronoun usage
who work
show examples
 for
car
companies
 may lose their job.
Hoverever
Correct your spelling
However
, some
says
Correct subject-verb agreement
say
show examples
 that it is the most
efficent
Correct your spelling
efficient
 way, but it
comes
Verb problem
has
show examples
 too many side effects. Because of these reasons, I consider
this
 is not a wise move.
Submitted by papaya on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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