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Writing Samples /
Band 6

The diagram below shows the production of olive oil. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

The diagram below shows the production of olive oil. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.
#production #oil #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The given diagram delineates the information of the process required for manufacturing
of
Change preposition
apply
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olive
oil
 from the
stratch
Correct your spelling
scratch
stretch
. Looking from an
overall
 perspective, it is readily apparent that
makig
Correct your spelling
making
 of olive
oil
 is a
six step
Add a hyphen
six-step
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 process followed by
the
Correct article usage
apply
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storage and
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
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. To commence with, olives are selected directly from the trees and collected into
number
Change the article
a number
the number
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 of
basket
Change to a plural noun
baskets
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. These selected olives are rinsed with the help of cold water. These rinsed olives, with the help of
belt
Add an article
a belt
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, moved to the
cyclindrical
Correct your spelling
cylindrical
 container. In
this
 container, smashing is done. After smashing two by-products are formed, one is olive paste,
while
 another one is olive stones. The formed olive paste is transferred to the bags with holes. After
transfering
Correct your spelling
transferring
, bags are pressed by putting some help weight on the top of
bag
Add an article
the bag
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. After pressing is done,
sepration
Correct your spelling
separation
 will take place in which
oil
 and water will be separated.
This
oil
 is transported to
local
Add an article
the local
a local
show examples
 market for storage and sale.
Submitted by khushiaggarwal255 on

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words oil with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Harvesting - the process of collecting ripe fruits, such as olives, from trees.
  • Rinsing - washing thoroughly with water to clean away debris or impurities.
  • Crushing - smashing or grinding something into small pieces or a paste.
  • Paste - a thick, soft mixture formed by crushing olives.
  • Pressing - the act of applying force to extract liquid.
  • Centrifuge - a machine that separates substances of different densities by spinning them rapidly.
  • Filtering - the process of removing impurities or unwanted particles from a liquid.
  • Bottling - packaging liquid in bottles for storage or sale.
  • Impurities - unwanted or foreign substances within a mixture.
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