The diagram below shows the stages involved in producing one bottle of wine.
The
process
diagram gives the eight steps to make a single bottle
of wine
.
Overall
, producing and transporting one bottle
of wine
is an eight-stage process
which starts from
picking the Change preposition
with
grapes
and ends with sending the bottles to the supper market. 400 grapes
are needed to produce one bottle
while
,
Remove the comma
apply
waste
is produced at three stages of this
process
.
First,
the grapes
are picked and collected to be juiced. During this
process
, 400 riped grapes
are needed to produce 3000ml of juice . The waste
generated from the juicing is sent to be composted. After that, the grape juice is left to ferment for two weeks before being sent to be pressed. The unpressed waste
is then
composted while
,
the remaining 100ml of liquid is sent through a filtration Remove the comma
apply
process
. The filtering system also
produces residual waste
, which is similarly
composed, while
the liquid is sent to be stored in barrels.
After having aged barrels for a period of time, the wine
is ready to be bottled. In total a single bottle
containing 750ml of wine
has been bottled, and it is ready to be sent to supermarkets to be sold.Submitted by shanikamaduri on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words process, bottle, wine, grapes, waste with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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