IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the percentage of households in owned and rented accommodation in England and Wales between 1918 and 2011. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the percentage of households in owned and rented accommodation in England and Wales between 1918 and 2011. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The chart illustrates the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of family
house
Fix the agreement mistake
houses
show examples
 in owned and rented
accommodation
Use synonyms
 in England and Wales,
1918
Change preposition
from 1918
show examples
 to 2011.
Overall
Linking Words
, the most noticeable trends are
household
Use synonyms
 in owned
accommodation
Use synonyms
 climbed dramatically
whereas
Linking Words
household
Use synonyms
 in rented
accommodation
Use synonyms
 decreased significantly over the period given. In 1918, the
household
Use synonyms
 in rented
accommodation
Use synonyms
, which had approximately 78%, was over triple in
percentage
Use synonyms
 compared to the owned
accommodation
Use synonyms
 of family house that just had 22%.
Moreover
Linking Words
, there is a similar
percentage
Use synonyms
 (68%)
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the
household
Use synonyms
 in rented
accommodation
Use synonyms
 between 1939 and 1953. The trend of
percentage
Use synonyms
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
decreased continually until 2001, and it
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
slightly increased
about
Change preposition
by about
show examples
 35% in 2011. With regards to the
household
Use synonyms
 in owned
accommodation
Use synonyms
, it had growth start from 1918 to 2001. It
also
Linking Words
 had the same
percentage
Use synonyms
 in 1939 and 1953 at just 31%.
However
Linking Words
,
in
Change the preposition
at
show examples
 the end of the period, in 2011, there
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
Correct article usage
a slightly
show examples
slightly increased
Replace the word
slight increase
show examples
approximately
Change preposition
of approximately
show examples
 32%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, accommodation, household with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trends" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
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