IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

‘Cannabis has been classified as a Class B drug in the UK since 2008 and carries a prison sentence of up to five years for possession.’ (Source: The Week) Many countries have decriminalised the use of cannabis and as a result have seen a reduction in drug related crime. Should cannabis and other soft drugs use be legalised? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#‘cannabis #class #b #drug #uk #prison #sentence #five #years #possession #source #week #countries #cannabis #reduction #crime #drugs
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There has been a recent debate whether
canabis
Correct your spelling
cannabis
 and soft
drugs
Use synonyms
 should be authorised by the
law makers
Correct your spelling
lawmakers
show examples
 or not. Even though , It
is
Verb problem
has
show examples
 proved extremely productive in the medical sectors
such
Linking Words
 as for anxiety , depression and cancer
patient
Fix the agreement mistake
patients
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, it has
also
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 dark side which can lead to hazardous
impact
Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
show examples
 after misusing it .
According to
Linking Words
me
Add a comma
me,
show examples
 it has both positive and negative
impact
Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
show examples
.I will discuss my both views in
this
Linking Words
 essay with relevant
eptiome
Correct your spelling
epitome
 and
well-defined
Correct article usage
a well-defined
show examples
 conclusion. To commence with, these
drugs
Use synonyms
 are inevitable for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society in terms of
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
 healthy balanced life.
Firstly
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, as we know , in
this
Linking Words
fast paced
Add a hyphen
fast-paced
show examples
 era everyone
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
hectic
Correct article usage
a hectic
show examples
 lifestyle so
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 obvious to get dragged towards depression
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
that case , it can act as
counterpart
Correct article usage
a counterpart
show examples
 for it to get some relaxation for an individual.
Secondly
Linking Words
, it would be
benefical
Correct your spelling
beneficial
 for any nation to boost their economy by trading it. which result in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
good
relation
Fix the agreement mistake
relations
show examples
 with
other country
Change the wording
another country
other countries
show examples
 to make
further
Linking Words
 trade.
Thirdly
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, After
authenticate
Change the verb form
authenticating
show examples
 it, there will be less smuggling
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 these
drugs
Use synonyms
 and people will not be distracted by it for the sake of
earing
Correct your spelling
earning
show examples
 money .
On the other hand
Linking Words
 , it has negative effects which cannot be neglected. To
beign
Correct your spelling
begin
 with, in
this
Linking Words
 modern era
every
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
one
Correct your spelling
everyone
show examples
 now
get found
Verb problem
has
show examples
 of
richy
Correct your spelling
rich
 and party lifestyle so
use
Correct article usage
the use
show examples
 of these soft
drugs
Use synonyms
 among
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
its
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
 quite common now days but they are ignoring the fact that it has nasty consequences towards their health and
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
 make use for long period of time can lead to loss of life.
Furthermore
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,
according to
Linking Words
 the
survery
Correct your spelling
survey
 of WHO , after
permiting
Correct your spelling
permitting
 the
drugs
Use synonyms
 in
canada
Change the capitalization
Canada
show examples
 there is a drastic incline in the death toll as compared to past years which is a
debateable
Correct your spelling
debatable
 thing for the safety of
community
Add an article
the community
show examples
.
To conclude
Linking Words
, these
drugs
Use synonyms
 are indispensable
assest
Correct your spelling
asset
assets
 for curing any health problem but
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 a moderate level.
However
Linking Words
, It has
a inferior effects
Correct the article-noun agreement
an inferior effect
inferior effects
show examples
 which cannot be denied .
Therefore
Linking Words
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 should take prompt actions to educate people about
this
Linking Words
 in order to keep the safety of folks as a preference.
Submitted by surjitsingh760 on

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task response
Make sure you address all parts of the prompt in your response. You should discuss both the positive and negative aspects of cannabis and soft drugs, and provide reasons and examples to support your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Organize your essay in a clear and logical manner. Use paragraphs to separate your ideas and ensure there is a clear introduction and conclusion.
lexical resource
Diversify your vocabulary and use more appropriate phrasing to express your ideas. Avoid repetitive language and strive for more precision in your word choices.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar. There are some errors that affect the clarity of your writing. Proofread your essay to catch and correct any mistakes.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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