IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

The line graph shows visits to and from the UK from 1979 to 1999, and the bar graph shows the most popular countries visited by UK residents in 1999.

The line graph shows visits to and from the UK from 1979 to 1999, and the bar graph shows the most popular countries visited by UK residents in 1999.
#line #visits #uk #bar #countries #residents
Those 2 graphs reveal information about the number of British tourists and
visitors
 in 2 decades since 1979 and the rates of favourite countries that
UK
people
 to travels in 1999. All in all,
people
 who went and gone in England increased from 1979 until 1999
while
 France and Spain were the favourite countries of
UK
 residents.
According to
 the line graph, in 1979 there was a high number of British in other countries around 12
million
people
. It was higher than
UK
visitors
 with just under 10
million
people
. In the next decade,
UK
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
three
Add a missing verb
had three
show examples
 folded numbers
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 30
million
people
,
while
 tourists in the
UK
 only doubled
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 20
million
people
. By 1999, England's
visitors
 had increased to almost 30 millions of
visitors
.
UK
 tourists surged up to over 50
million
people
. Moving to the bar chart, in 1999, France was the most favourite destination country among
UK
 residents with over 10
million
 travellers. The next most popular country was Spain
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
 around 9
million
UK
visitors
. Meanwhile,
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
, Greece, and Turkey were the least famous
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
 visited by the British with less than 4
million
visitors
.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words visitors, uk, people, million with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graphs" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: