Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Nowadays power,
wealthvand
money are Correct your spelling
wealth and
notdivided
equally among people. Because, Some laid-back individuals claim that we should be convinced of our possessions and professional Correct your spelling
not divided
statuse
Correct your spelling
status
while
some ambitious believe that by doing our best and working hard as much as possible we will have a more wealthy and pleasurable life
. Also
, I think so and in this
essay, I will delve into these two attitudes.
On one hand, we can see that lenient populations are disinclined to put themselves under pressure in order to make progress in their life
or profession. Because,
these people are neither determined nor risk Remove the comma
apply
taker
. Taking my friend as an example, she is working in Fix the agreement mistake
takers
company
and Add an article
a company
the company
receive
a minimum amount of salary. she always admits that if she starts her own Correct subject-verb agreement
receives
bussines
, she Correct your spelling
business
would
go strength for strength. Possibly, they want to replace Wrong verb form
will
on
the Change preposition
apply
ground convenient
Add a hyphen
ground-convenient
life
by
difficulties and excruciating efforts. Change preposition
with
As a result
, these groups of people would be just consumers of hard workers' successes and acheivements
.
Correct your spelling
achievements
On the other hand
, many ambitious are unconvinced of what they have and consequently
try assiduously to improve their lives day by day. To illustrate this
, Professor Majid Samii, who is one of the most famous neurosurgeons and medical scientists explained in his biography that ten years of relentless efforts,which accompanied
Add a missing verb
were accompanied
with
financial Change preposition
by
hinders
brought him to Replace the word
hindrances
this
appreciable situation. Thus
, it can be concluded that individuals would experience more converient
and Correct your spelling
convenient
peacefull
lifestyles if they plan and put a considerable amount of attempts Correct your spelling
peaceful
on
fulfilling dreams.
In conclusion, since Change preposition
into
life
is usually accompanied with
unpredicted Change preposition
by
challenge
, learning to confront Fix the agreement mistake
challenges
with
them to solve them seems more logical Change preposition
apply
rather
than withdrawing from them.Rephrase
apply
Submitted by golriiz23 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and supporting sentences that relate to the main point. Use appropriate transition words and phrases to clearly connect ideas throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
Provide a clear introduction and conclusion that summarize the main ideas of the essay. This will help to provide a well-rounded and complete response to the prompt.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary by using more varied and precise words. Additionally, pay attention to word choice and ensure that your sentences flow smoothly.
grammatical range
Work on sentence structure and grammatical accuracy. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement, verb tense consistency, and sentence structure.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.