The table below gives information about the problems faced by children in two primary schools in 2005 and 2015.

The table below gives information about the problems faced by children in two primary schools in 2005 and 2015.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
A glance at the figure provided reveals the percentage of schoolchildren having a variety of learning problems in 2 elementary schools in 2005 and 2015.
Overall
Linking Words
, students in
School
Use synonyms
B
Use synonyms
had better academic performance than
children
Use synonyms
in
School
Use synonyms
A.
Nonetheless
Linking Words
, some profound progressions
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
School
Use synonyms
A could be witnessed from spelling to understanding instructions.
According to
Linking Words
the evidence supplied in 2005, 22% and 28% of students in
School
Use synonyms
A found reading and handwriting
being
Wrong verb form
to be
show examples
too subtle to understand.
While
Linking Words
only 8% and 7%
Use synonyms
children
Change preposition
of children
show examples
in
School
Use synonyms
B
Use synonyms
, which
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
forth
Correct your spelling
fourth
show examples
of
School
Use synonyms
A, were shackled
these
Change preposition
to these
show examples
problems. Plus, the rest categories saw wider gaps between 2 primary schools, especially
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
ability to follow the
displines
Correct your spelling
disciplines
discipline
. Troublesome
children
Use synonyms
, who were not aware of the instructions in
School
Use synonyms
A, were 7 times more than
School
Use synonyms
B
Use synonyms
. Despite poorer academic achievement,
School
Use synonyms
A lessened the gaps with
School
Use synonyms
B
Use synonyms
remarkably after a decade in 2015.
In particular
Linking Words
,
children
Use synonyms
easily distracted in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
class dropped from 40% to 18%, and a similar plummet could be found in following instructions as well.
Submitted by meimei639 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words school, b, children with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: