IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The two maps below show the village of Bunborough in the present day and plans for the village in 2024.

The two maps below show the village of Bunborough in the present day and plans for the village in 2024.
#two #maps #show #village #bunborough #plans
The graphs illustrate the Bunborough
village
 in existing time and
future
 plans for the small town in 2024.
Overall
, in the
future
 empty areas will be used to build different buildings. One of the farms will be redesigned to be
poultry
Correct article usage
a poultry
show examples
farm
instead
 of
regular
Correct article usage
a regular
show examples
farm
. The
village
 store will close and
supermarket
Correct article usage
a supermarket
show examples
 might open in the
future
. In the present day, the majority of the
village
 area is empty.
Therefore
, the
future
Fix the agreement mistake
plan
show examples
plans
Fix the agreement mistake
plan
show examples
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 to replace these empty areas with
different
Add an article
a different
show examples
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
such
 as the community soccer field near the farms and
Correct article usage
the supermarket
show examples
supermarket
Correct article usage
the supermarket
show examples
 near the cooperative bank. In the
future
, the
farm
 near the main road will be
poultry
Correct article usage
a poultry
show examples
farm
instead
 of
regular
Correct article usage
a regular
show examples
farm
.
Additionally
, the
village
 store will close and the employment assistance building
takes
Wrong verb form
will take
show examples
 over next to the prayer centre.
Submitted by ibrakh80 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "instead".
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words village, future, farm with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • maps
  • village
  • present day
  • plans
  • 2024
  • overview
  • key differences
  • road network
  • infrastructure
  • residential areas
  • recreational spaces
  • impact
  • environment
  • benefits
  • challenges
  • proposed changes
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