IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

On one hand, nuclear power provides cheap and clean energy. On the other hand, nuclear weapons are a potent threat to world peace. Do the benefits of nuclear technology outweigh the risks? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#hand #power #energy #weapons #threat #world #peace #technology #risks
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Notions about nuclear
power
 have been always a conflict since the beginning.
While
 some people consider
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nuclear
power
 as a clean and less expensive
source
 of
energy
, others indicate
about
Correct pronoun usage
it about
show examples
 potential threat to
world
Add an article
the world
show examples
. I believe in the latter belief, and in
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
 I will explain why the risks of nuclear
power
outweitgh
Correct your spelling
outweigh
outweighs
 the advantages. Considering mostly preferred
energy
 sources like fossil fuels, oil and
colar
Correct your spelling
coal
, the impact of these
energy
 sources on our climate has been becoming increasingly worse
recent
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in recent
show examples
 days.
As a consequence
 of
common
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their common
show examples
 usage
of
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apply
show examples
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
them
Add a comma
them,
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 we face devastating effects of climate change,
imcluding
Correct your spelling
including
 rising sea
level
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levels
show examples
,
unpredictable
Correct word choice
and unpredictable
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 weather. These
amendmends
Correct your spelling
amendments
 are resulting in numerous negative
change
Fix the agreement mistake
changes
show examples
,
such
 as water shortage,
loss
Correct word choice
and loss
show examples
 of crops, in the long term .
However
these kind
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this kind
these kinds
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 of resources are limited,
we
Correct word choice
and we
show examples
 are likely to face price
spike
Fix the agreement mistake
spikes
show examples
 frequently.
For instance
, oil prices have risen remarkably for the
last
 five years.
On the other hand
, nuclear
power
 has been represented as a clean
energy
source
 since they have no disposal
waste
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of waste
show examples
 like smog which
emits
Wrong verb form
is emitted
show examples
 when coal burns.
Furthermore
, because
of
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apply
show examples
nuclear
enery
Correct your spelling
energy
 comes from
atom
Fix the agreement mistake
atoms
show examples
, it can
consider
Wrong verb form
be considered
show examples
as
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apply
show examples
a limitless
source
 so may be cheaper
tham
Correct your spelling
than
liited
Correct your spelling
local
 resources like oil and coal.
However
, there is a devastating risk about nuclear
power
, which is a tiny mistake or distraction
may
Correct pronoun usage
that may
show examples
 lead to
long-lasting
Correct article usage
a long-lasting
show examples
 harmful impact on
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
.
For example
, since
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 accident in
Chernobil
Correct your spelling
Chernobyl
, people who
live
Wrong verb form
lived
show examples
 around the factory died in pain and their children suffered from
long-lasting
Add an article
the long-lasting
show examples
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
show examples
 of
this
 accident.
Moreover
, the land around the factory
becamed
Correct your spelling
became
 infertil,
as
Correct word choice
and as
show examples
 a
result
Add the comma(s)
result,
show examples
 local people lost
their
Change the word
the
show examples
 huge amounts of income which
comes
Wrong verb form
came
show examples
 from
agricultiral
Correct your spelling
agricultural
 activity. In conclusion,
while
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nuclear
power
 has positive sides, I find it very risky for our world’s future
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and believe
in
Change preposition
that
show examples
 the dangers of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nuclear
power
outweitgh
Correct your spelling
outweigh
outweighs
 the advantages. With
this
 perspective, I defend that until
scientist
Fix the agreement mistake
scientists
show examples
invent
Change the verb form
invents
show examples
 a new and
indanger
Correct your spelling
in danger
endanger
endangered
enery
Correct your spelling
energy
source
, we should limit our consumption of current
enery
Correct your spelling
energy
 sources.
Additionally
, governments should support factories
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 changing their
energy
source
 toward renewable ones like wind, hydropower or solar.
Submitted by ilaydailday on

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coherence
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and follows a logical sequence.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your arguments.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary to enhance your essay.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structures and grammar errors.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Nuclear power
  • Cheap and clean energy
  • Nuclear weapons
  • Threat to world peace
  • Benefits
  • Risks
  • Potent threat
  • Deterrence
  • Security
  • Accidents
  • Disasters
  • Misuse
  • Balancing
  • Strict regulations
  • International cooperation
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