IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 1.5

Most people believe that stricter punishment should be given for traffic offences. To what extent do you agree?

#people #punishment #traffic #offences
It is said that the majority of people think that traffic rules are not strict enough today,the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 has to make them more efficient and stronger,
due to
 the fact that road
acciedences
Correct your spelling
accidents
 are increasing. I absolutely agree with
this
 innovation which will make car driving safer for pedestrians and drivers.
Firstly
, in
this
 day and age, a plethora of deaths on the road is seen and crucially increases. The
resposibility
Correct your spelling
responsibility
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
accidiences
Correct your spelling
accidents
 absolutely belongs to the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 and their incompetence in the question of
citiziences
Correct your spelling
citizens
 safety. Changing
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the traffic rules is
nessecary
Correct your spelling
necessary
, the project of making them stricter is an
incredeable
Correct your spelling
incredible
 solution.It will lead to
death
Correct article usage
the death
show examples
 rate decreasing
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because
Correct your spelling
irresponsible
irresposible
Correct your spelling
irresponsible
 drivers will get
Submitted by aisha.alen99 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Response
Ensure that your essay clearly addresses the prompt and maintains a clear stance throughout.
Coherence and Cohesion
Organize your ideas logically and use appropriate transitions to improve coherence.
Lexical Resource
Expand your range of vocabulary and use more precise and varied language.
Grammatical Range
Pay attention to grammatical accuracy and sentence structure.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: