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Writing Samples /
Band 7

The charts below show the percentage of male and female workers in country A and country B. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the percentage of male and female workers in country A and country B. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #percentage #workers #country #b #information #features #comparisons
The
given
Verb problem
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pie chart illustrates the proportion of men and women who
work
 in three different majors
such
Correct quantifier usage
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as
Change preposition
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Service
,
Agriculture
, and Industry between countries A and
B
. In general, it is noticeable that
,
Remove the comma
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service
 is the most attractive career for both males and females
while
 those in
country
,
B
 dominate the other.
In addition
, there was a tiny fraction of
agriculture
 in
country
B
while
 the opposite was true for
country
 A. In detail, in terms of
country
 A, 56% of their male staff
work
 in
service
, followed by the percentage of male workers who
work
 in
agriculture
 29% . A similar separation was seen in the figure for female workers serving in
service
 and
agriculture
 was 49% and 43% respectively. In
country
B
, the figures for male and female employment in
service
-related jobs are the most significant, at 65% and 88% respectively. On the other contrary, both males and females only accounted for a small percentage of
agriculture
 5% compared to 1%.
While
 male and female
work
 in industry accounted for 32% and 11% .
Submitted by phongnguyenthanh630 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words work, service, agriculture, b, country with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • percentage
  • gender employment rate
  • workforce
  • disparity
  • employment trend
  • notable difference
  • counterpart
  • demographic
  • labor market
  • sector
  • predominantly
  • employment rate
  • analysis
  • comparative study
  • statistical data
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