Some people say that outdoor activities benefit children’s development rather than computer games. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Technology advancement has brought modern society immense convenience.
However
, the popularization of computer games
in Correct article usage
the youger
youger
generation has Correct your spelling
younger
also
generated several concerns that may potentially hindered
children’s Change the verb form
hinder
development
mentally and physically. Thus
, some argue that youngersters
should engage more Correct your spelling
youngsters
on
outdoor activities rather than immersing themselves in Change preposition
in
virtual
world. I Add an article
the virtual
a virtual
competely
agree with Correct your spelling
completely
this
perspective.
First and foremost, excessive exposure of
virtual thrills has Change preposition
to
arise
several concerns that may potentially harm children’s mental Verb problem
raised
development
. It is undoubtedly that adolescents nowadays devote too much attention to digital games
, and in some severe cases, it may cause cyber addition
. Correct your spelling
addiction
Furthermore
, various traits such
as social awareness, communication skills, and teamwork capability require frequent interaction with people. By engaging in outdoor acivities
, Correct your spelling
activities
such
as football, camping and outings, it
increase people’s connection with one another. Without those connections, children might encounter obstacles in Correct pronoun usage
apply
the
public, or even develop social anxiety. Correct article usage
apply
As a result
, outdoor leisure could yeild
long-term benefits for Correct your spelling
yield
childern
Correct your spelling
children
comparing
with playing computer Wrong verb form
compared
games
.
In addition
, outdoor activities benefit young people with improved physical development
, which is not achievable through devotion in
virtual Change preposition
to
games
. It is not uncommon to witness young individuals suffering from Myopia, which is mainly cause
by playing video Change the form of the verb
caused
games
or overengross in digital platforms. By shifting people’s leisure time toward outdoor activities, it could reduce time spent on harmful matters, and therefore
, enhance the health for
juveniles. Change preposition
of
Moreover
, the benefits extend beyond this
, people could develop a healthy routine and exercise regularly. This
could not only be stress reliefing
but Correct your spelling
relieving
relief
also
improve people’s lifestyles in many ways, for example
, providing
a better Change preposition
by providing
night
sleep.
Change noun form
night's
To sum up
, I firmly believe that the
outdoor Correct article usage
apply
leisures
Fix the agreement mistake
leisure
instead
of computer games
are far more benefical
for children’s Correct your spelling
beneficial
development
, both mentally and physically.Submitted by jessieiniar1202 on
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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.