People's shopping habits depend on the age group they belong to than other factors. To what extend do you agree or disagree ?

Who is in a hectic schedule, mostly like a thing is shopping. There is an argument
people's
Correct word choice
that people's
show examples
shopping
habits
depend on their age other than any
factors
Correct word choice
other factors
show examples
. In
this
essay, I would like to say my choice, Which is
agree
Fix the infinitive
to agree
show examples
without
disagree
Wrong verb form
disagreeing
show examples
. To commence with, everybody who
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
living on
this
planet mostly
prefer
Change the verb form
prefers
show examples
thing is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
buying whether any other
habits
like eating,sleeping,traveling and collecting items.
Moreover
, if we look at, Why
this
is more famous, We have various answers for
this
.
Because online
Correct word choice
Online
show examples
shopping,home delivery system and a plethora of collection attract
customers
Change noun form
customers'
customer's
show examples
mind. As an adult woman, If I can
control
my mind to buy or not our kids do not
control
it. They can not
control
it because they
have
Add a missing verb
do have
show examples
not great thinking
pattern
Fix the agreement mistake
patterns
show examples
like adults.Kids always go shopping with their parents and can
control
them after
checked
Wrong verb form
checking
show examples
the
Change the word
their
show examples
wallet
Fix the agreement mistake
wallets
show examples
. If mothers do not have money, kid's ideas do not bloom. Indeed, We have
been became
Wrong verb form
become
show examples
young, adults and old we can
get
Verb problem
make
show examples
decisions. After
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
18
years
Add a comma
years,
show examples
someone
choose
Change the verb form
chooses
show examples
their career and
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can get
monthly
Add an article
a monthly
the monthly
show examples
payment. So
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the most preferable age
most
Add a missing verb
is most
show examples
of them
addict
Replace the word
addicted
show examples
to shopping. In that time period
youngers
Replace the word
young people's
show examples
hearts
stole
Wrong verb form
were stolen
show examples
by some major items. For
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
instance, they love
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
mobiles, clothes,
jewelleries
Change the wording
jewellery
pieces of jewellery
show examples
, watches and perfumes. Not only that but
also
some technical instruments which help to their day to day
choes
Correct your spelling
chores
shoes
.
Although
it is not a mistake
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
new
Correct article usage
the new
show examples
generation, it
also
Add a missing verb
is also
show examples
a marketing trick.By comparing
another
Replace the adjective
another habit
other habits
show examples
habits
, most of
that
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
can not
show
Wrong verb form
be shown
show examples
to others.
Therefor
Correct your spelling
Therefore
show examples
, buying is more
demand
Change preposition
in demand
show examples
in
this
era among the youngest. In conclusion, We can select our choices, even a habit and;
habits
are different one
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
by the way, shopping is one of them and most of the youngest love online or go to shops and buy varieties.
Submitted by rnjayasinghe71 on

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task response
Ensure that you address all parts of the prompt and clearly state your position and reasons.
coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas in a clear and coherent manner, using appropriate paragraphing and linking devices.
lexical resource
Expand your vocabulary and use more precise and sophisticated words and phrases to express your ideas.
grammatical range
Work on improving your sentence structure and grammar to avoid errors and enhance clarity.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumption patterns
  • digital natives
  • e-commerce
  • brick-and-mortar stores
  • target demographic
  • disposable income
  • consumer behavior
  • market segmentation
  • purchasing power
  • retail therapy
  • brand loyalty
  • impulse buying
  • price-sensitive
  • cross-generational
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