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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Completing university is thought be some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

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Some people believe that getting a
university
Use synonyms
 degree opens many doors for your future career. Others,
however
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, oppose
this
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 view by saying that soft
skills
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along with
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 profound
knowledge
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 are more essential. I gravitate to the second camp, which thinks that getting
experience
Use synonyms
 is crucial for the individual,
nevertheless
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, both views will be elaborated on here. On the one hand, there are two key reasons why completing a
university
Use synonyms
 education is considered to be so important.
Firstly
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, a diploma demonstrates that a student is interested in the field of study and possesses a great
knowledge
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 of it. Because
otherwise
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, he wouldn’t be able to finish his studies.
Secondly
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, people who
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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have finished a tertiary education are used to staying focused for a long period of time and
therefore
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,
study
Wrong verb form
studying
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 effectively .
For instance
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, big companies often look for individuals who have
university
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degree
Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
show examples
 because they are often motivated and willing to improve their
skills
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. On the other side of the argument,
experience
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 and soft
skills
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 are not less important. If the person previously worked in the field or took related courses, they already have the practical
skills
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 that are needed.
Moreover
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, the person is well aware of all the issues that can follow that job and has useful
knowledge
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 on how to actually solve them. As an example, for IT or related fields, a diploma is not that crucial, because it gives just academic
knowledge
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 and not practical
skills
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 to receive an offer.
Whereas
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 one's
experience
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 can play an important role when it comes to getting the job. In summary, both sides of the argument regarding the different opinions on getting a good job have strong support. Even though a
university
Use synonyms
 degree creates a strong base for a future career, as far as I am concerned,
experience
Use synonyms
 and soft
skills
Use synonyms
 are of utmost importance.

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task response
Make sure to fully address both sides of the argument and provide a balanced discussion.
coherence cohesion
Maintain a clear and logical structure throughout the essay.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary and use more precise and varied expressions.
grammatical range
Pay attention to your sentence structure and grammar to avoid errors.
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