IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Your English-speaking friend who lives in your town has asked for your advice about learning a new sport. Write an email to your friend. In your email, •recommend a new sport that would be suitable for your friend to learn • explain how your friend could learn this sport • suggest that you both learn this sport together

#friend #lives #town #advice #sport #email #•recommend
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Dear Jai, Hope you are in
best
Correct article usage
the best
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 of health. I believe you enjoy the beauty and culture of our town. As you asked me to suggest a new sport which you can easily learn in our locality,
So
Rephrase
apply
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I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter and hope you like my suggestion.
Firstly
Linking Words
, our residential area is popular
in
Change preposition
for
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 sports as
number
Change the article
a number
the number
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 of events are organized every month. There are separate stadiums for soccer,
cricket
Use synonyms
, badminton
court
Fix the agreement mistake
courts
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 and swimming pools.
According to
Linking Words
 me, you will learn
cricket
Use synonyms
 because it is
very
Add an article
a very
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 interesting game which you enjoy the most.
Besides
Linking Words
, it is a good way to do exercise and make our body in perfect shape.
Moreover
Linking Words
, you can join the youth sports academy which is totally free and provides training to play
cricket
Use synonyms
.
Addition
Change preposition
In addition
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 to it, you can select your own schedule as you studied in a college so it is good for you to pick a slot in the evening.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, it is easy for you to meet new players and you can participate in
locality
Replace the word
local
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sport
Change the noun form
sports
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 events once you get trained
how
Change preposition
in how
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 to play
cricket
Use synonyms
. Especially, you will be happy to hear that I am
also
Linking Words
 willing to learn
this
Linking Words
 sport as I really enjoy watching
cricket
Use synonyms
 on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
television.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I feel we will start practising
this
Linking Words
 game from next Monday. I believe you agree with me and I am waiting for your response. Best regards, LS
Submitted by tajinder.panag on

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task achievement
Ensure that all aspects of the task prompt have been addressed fully.
coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas in a clear and logical manner using appropriate paragraphing.
lexical resource
Expand your vocabulary and use a wider range of lexical items.
grammatical range
Pay attention to grammatical accuracy to minimize errors.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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