As global trade increases, many goods including those we use on a daily basis are produced in other countries and have to be transported long distance.  Do the benefits of this trend outweigh the drawbacks?

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There is no doubt these days that many
goods
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are being manufactured in other
countries
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and
then
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being delivered long distance. The question is, is
this
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thing beneficial? In
this
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essay, I am going to discuss the benefits and the drawbacks of
this
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. In terms of advantages,
goods
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being produced in foreign
countries
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might be good
due to
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low labour costs. The main reason to support
this
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claim is to help developing
countries
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in increasing employment rates and high product quality. To illustrate, many international companies manufacture their
goods
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in Nepal,
this
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will help the people to gain jobs with low cost and giving the world a good product quality.
However
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, producing products in other
countries
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might be discriminating against human
rights
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.
Firstly
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, in many
countries
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, people work for long hours at a very low cost.
In other words
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, in Bangladesh, some worldwide companies set up their factories in
such
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countries
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, and they employ people for only 50 cents per hour for 12 hours a day for 7 days with no
day-offs
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day off
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.
This
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is because to increase the production rate with no taking into account the
rights
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of these employees.
Also
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,
such
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companies do not even offer their employees the most basic
rights
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,
such
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as health insurance or even healthy working conditions. In conclusion, producing
goods
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in foreign
countries
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might be beneficial if we take into account the
rights
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of the employees,
otherwise
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,
this
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is considered as humiliating the
rights
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of
such
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workers.
Submitted by osama2010b on

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task response
Ensure a more balanced discussion in presenting both the benefits and drawbacks of global trade and outsourcing.
coherence and cohesion
The essay lacks a clear and well-organized structure. Work on developing a clearer introduction and conclusion, as well as organizing the main points in a more coherent manner.
lexical resource
The essay demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary, but there is a need for more precise and varied vocabulary to convey ideas effectively.
grammatical range
There is a good control of basic grammar and sentence structures. However, work on using complex structures and more sophisticated language to enhance the overall quality of writing.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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