IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The bar chart below describes some changes about the percentage of people were born in Australia and who were born outside Australia living in urban, rural and town between 1995 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The bar chart below describes some changes about the percentage of people were born in Australia and who were born outside Australia living in urban, rural and town between 1995 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.
#minutes #bar #changes #percentage #people #australia #town #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The Bar Chart illustrates the trend of how
people
Use synonyms
 who were born outside and inside
Australia
Use synonyms
living
Wrong verb form
lived
show examples
 in urban, rural, and town between 1995 and 2010. Basically, Most of the
people
Use synonyms
 who were born in
Australia
Use synonyms
 in the mid-nineties prefer to live in
cities
Use synonyms
 rather than
towns
Use synonyms
 and rural
areas
Use synonyms
. The same trend is observed for the
people
Use synonyms
 who were born outside
Australia
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. About 60
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of non-Australians tend to live in
cities
Use synonyms
 and more than 40
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percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of Australians
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lives
Correct subject-verb agreement
live
show examples
 in
cities
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. In both cases,
people
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 prefer to live in
cities
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.
However
Linking Words
,
people
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 living in
towns
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 and rural
areas
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 are comparable less than
people
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 living in
cities
Use synonyms
. 20
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of Australians
Use synonyms
lives
Correct subject-verb agreement
live
show examples
 in
towns
Use synonyms
 and more than 20
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of the Australian Population
lives
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 in Rural
Areas
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. Non-Australians
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
show examples
 a different trend where 40
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percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of the population
lives
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 in rural
areas
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 and less than 20
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percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
lives
Use synonyms
 in rural
areas
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. In 2010, 60
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of Australian
People
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 were born in
Cities
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,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and less than 20
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percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of the population
born
Add a missing verb
was born
show examples
 either in
towns
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 or rural
areas
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. But, Non-Australians were born mostly in
cities
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 rather than
towns
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 and rural
areas
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whereas
Linking Words
 a whooping 80
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 were born outside
Australia
Use synonyms
 living in
cities
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by vigvic013 on

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, australia, cities, towns, areas, percent, lives with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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