Some people regard video games as harmless fun, or even as a useful educational tool. Others, however, believe that videos games are having an adverse effect on the people who play them. In your opinion, do the drawbacks of video games outweigh the benefits?
While
some think that online games allow individuals to have a good time when learning new things, others oppose that idea and affirm that they can be dangerous for us. The essay will demonstrate that gaming can create joyful moments between friends, but also
that it can be harmful to human beings that are going to spend too much time playing. The essay will argue that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages.
Indeed, computer games allow friends to share a quality moment while
learning new things. Most of them are meant to be played with friends or family and are even going to allow us to create new friendships. Furthermore
, they too will help us learn several things and develop skills that are useful in life. For example
, a study led by Harvard University in the United States in 2019 showed that teenagers aged 13 to 17 who play the video game “Call of Duty” at least twice per week develop survival skills and instincts and are able to live by themselves without adults thanks to these skills, and consequently
, those who do not play “Call of Duty” will not.
However
, gaming can be harmful to the individual. Children will often spend too much time in front of their computer or TV, and that will lead to negative health effects, such
as headaches, lower back pain or even sight loss. Moreover
, if they play too much, they will become addicted and even depressed. For instance
, a French hospital called Saint-Cyprien located in Paris confirmed that in the year 2024, more than 840 kids aged between 12 and 15 got in the hospital because of their computer addiction. The doctors said that it caused them to develop terrible one-week-long headaches and mood swings that scared their parents very much.
To conclude
, gaming can be fun and sometimes even educational, but it can be very dangerous as well for us and can lead to addiction and bad physical and mental health. Hence
, the disadvantages clearly outweigh the positive effects of it.Submitted by santos_dij on
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task achievement
Ensure all examples are accurate and up-to-date. The example about "Call of Duty" and the Harvard study seems hypothetical. Ensure examples are factual or clarify them as hypothetical if meant to illustrate a point.
coherence cohesion
Consider varying sentence structures to enhance readability and keep the reader engaged. While your points are clear, varying structures can improve flow and interest.
introduction conclusion present
Your essay has a clear introductory paragraph that outlines the structure and stance of your argument.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarizes your argument and reinforces your thesis that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages.
supported main points
You provided two clear main points, supporting both sides of your argument, which helps create a balanced essay before arriving at your own conclusion.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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