With increasing populations and ever growing urban centre, many countries are losing their natural beauty spots. What benefits are there to protecting places of natural beauty? How can this be solved?

#populations #centre #countries #beauty #spots #places #be

Nowadays, many countries are losing their natural because of the rapid population in the urban areas. By protecting these attraction points the country can boost

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apply

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their economy and

also

a clean and fresh environment.

This

problem can be solved by a strict lookup to these areas. Preserving the natural beauty points can make the city environment clean.

This

can make the

surrounding

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surroundings

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clean and reduce

deseases

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diseases

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With

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clean

Correct article usage

a clean

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and fresh environment, a person's mental health and well-being

became

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become

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improved.

Furthermore

, preserving

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apply

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natural beauty can boost

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tourism.

This

can grow the economy of the country and create opportunities for different works. Take a tuck shop

for instance

. One shop can create opportunities for

labors

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labourers

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and investors.

Moreover

, these attractions are a biodiversity of many organisms.

By preserving

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Preserving

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these can preserve their natural habitat which can benefit humans in numerous ways.

This

problem can be solved by both,

government

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the government

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and the locals. The government must restrict these places for tourism and prohibit

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timber companies or any concerned organization.

This

can be done only if the government

passed

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passes

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a law about that, deforestation or destroying natural places is

crime

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a crime

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and must be punished. It is

also

Correct article usage

the

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Correct article usage

the

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duty of local people to take care of these points, keep them clean and take care of the biodiversity of

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organisms

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organism

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organisms

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Wrong verb form

depending

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depend

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depending

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these natural places. To summarize, humans have obtained various benefits from natural wonders so it is our duty to conserve these locations. Abiding by laws and changing poor behaviours, I believe that we can improve natural spots and the local economy as well.

Submitted by umark5353 on Fri Nov 10 2023

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Coherence and Cohesion

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Task Achievement

The essay partially addresses the task and provides some relevant ideas, but lacks depth and specific examples. More detailed and supported points are needed to fully address the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

264 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

preserve
biodiversity
recreation
boost
tourism
mental health
well-being
education
research
ecosystem services
sustainable development
cultural heritage

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With increasing populations and ever growing urban centre, many countries are losing their natural beauty spots. What benefits are there to protecting places of natural beauty? How can this be solved?

Fully explain your ideas

Shopping is the favourite free time activity for many young people today. Why do you think this has happened? Should young people be encouraged to do different activities in their free time rather than shopping?

Mobile phones and smart devices should be restricted and that young people should not be allowed to have them. Only people of a certain age should have permission to own them. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this proposal? What is your opinion?

Topic: Some people think that hosting an international sports event is good for the country, while some people think it is bad. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many countries around the world,rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. do you think this is a positive or a negative developement,

Some people believe that many of the problems in today's world are caused by a lack of cultural understanding. What can be done to help people understand cultures which are different from their own?