With increasing populations and ever growing urban centre, many countries are losing their natural beauty spots. What benefits are there to protecting places of natural beauty? How can this be solved?

Nowadays, many countries are losing their natural because of the rapid population in the urban areas. By protecting these attraction points the country can boost
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their economy and
also
a clean and fresh environment.
This
problem can be solved by a strict lookup to these areas. Preserving the natural beauty points can make the city environment clean.
This
can make the
surrounding
Fix the agreement mistake
surroundings
show examples
clean and reduce
deseases
Correct your spelling
diseases
.
By
Change preposition
With
show examples
clean
Correct article usage
a clean
show examples
and fresh environment, a person's mental health and well-being
became
Wrong verb form
become
show examples
improved.
Furthermore
, preserving
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
natural beauty can boost
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
tourism.
This
can grow the economy of the country and create opportunities for different works. Take a tuck shop
for instance
. One shop can create opportunities for
labors
Replace the word
labourers
show examples
and investors.
Moreover
, these attractions are a biodiversity of many organisms.
By preserving
Change preposition
Preserving
show examples
these can preserve their natural habitat which can benefit humans in numerous ways.
This
problem can be solved by both,
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
and the locals. The government must restrict these places for tourism and prohibit
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
timber companies or any concerned organization.
This
can be done only if the government
passed
Wrong verb form
passes
show examples
a law about that, deforestation or destroying natural places is
crime
Add an article
a crime
show examples
and must be punished. It is
also
Correct article usage
the
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
duty of local people to take care of these points, keep them clean and take care of the biodiversity of
Fix the agreement mistake
organisms
show examples
organism
Fix the agreement mistake
organisms
show examples
Wrong verb form
depending
show examples
depend
Wrong verb form
depending
show examples
Change preposition
in
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
these natural places. To summarize, humans have obtained various benefits from natural wonders so it is our duty to conserve these locations. Abiding by laws and changing poor behaviours, I believe that we can improve natural spots and the local economy as well.
Submitted by umark5353 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence and Cohesion
The essay lacks a clear structure and coherence. The ideas are not well-organized, and the points lack proper development and support.
Task Achievement
The essay partially addresses the task and provides some relevant ideas, but lacks depth and specific examples. More detailed and supported points are needed to fully address the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • preserve
  • biodiversity
  • recreation
  • boost
  • tourism
  • mental health
  • well-being
  • education
  • research
  • ecosystem services
  • sustainable development
  • cultural heritage
What to do next:
Look at other essays: