Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
Personal
information
are
being asked by employers from Change the verb form
is
job
applicants. There are differences in opinion in
Change preposition
on
this
aspect. Some people
think that such
information
is essential and others say irrelevant. I believe that these kinds of details
are essential
part of human resources management in most of the organization. In Add an article
an essential
this
essay, I will explain both pros and corns
of Correct your spelling
cons
this
statement with examples.
To begin
with, firstly
, information
obtains
from Wrong verb form
obtained
interviewer
Correct article usage
the interviewer
are
meaningful for most of the corporate world. In Correct subject-verb agreement
is
modern
business environment, Add an article
a modern
the modern
majority
of organizations are involved in updating their database Correct article usage
the majority
of
future reference. To cite an example, with Change preposition
for
surge
in Add an article
the surge
a surge
number
of employees Change the article
a number
the number
inorder
to support business projects, there are huge Correct your spelling
in order
requirement
Fix the agreement mistake
requirements
of advance
database for maintaining Change preposition
for advanced
personal
Correct article usage
the personal
details
of each employees
so that Change to a singular noun
employee
employer
can extract Fix the agreement mistake
employers
details
of their resources in efficient
manner. Change the article
an efficient
Secondly
, most organizations are people centric
Add a hyphen
people-centric
therefore
they require individual details
of job
seekers so that they can keep in touch with employees in long
run and create strong Correct article usage
the long
connects
among team structure. Replace the word
connections
Therefore
, personal information
is necessary to obtain from job
applicants.
Even though,
there are innumerable benefits to Remove the comma
apply
obtain
Wrong verb form
obtaining
the
personalized Correct article usage
apply
information
from job
seekers, however
some Add a comma
however,
people
believe that obtaining these
Change the determiner
this information
information
are
not Change the verb form
is
update
to the mark. Resources usually join companies to Wrong verb form
updated
outperforming
their work. They require Wrong verb form
outperform
skill
set to perform their jobs Correct article usage
a skill
therefore
it's not necessary to enquire about their specific hobbies, interest
and family Fix the agreement mistake
interests
details
. For instance
, some new joiners may not feel comfortable to share
their individual Change the verb form
sharing
details
to
anyone Change preposition
with
therefore
they may be reluctant to share these generalized
Change the determiner
this generalized information
information
. Therefore
, it is recommended for
companies Correct word choice
that
to
obtain Fix the infinitive
apply
these
Change the determiner
this information
information
as per individual
choices of Correct article usage
the individual
people
.
To conclude
, seeking specific details
from job
seekers are essential aspect for
Change preposition
of
companies
practice as they are looking for more Change noun form
companies'
company's
details
from individuals for their database. However
, too much
personal Correct quantifier usage
many
details
are not required as applicants may not feel comfortable with this
approach. Therefore
, careful consideration is essential while
obtaining such
information
from individuals.Submitted by deep.amans86 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay has a clear structure with distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Use cohesive devices to make transitions between ideas smoother, and ensure logical sequencing of points throughout. While your essay does showcase this to an extent, improvements can be made for better clarity.
task achievement
When addressing the task given, make sure to cover all aspects of the prompt in detail. Provide more specific examples and explanations to support your viewpoints, and ensure your own opinion is distinct and encapsulates all dimensions of the essay question.
lexical resource
Vary your vocabulary to accurately convey your points and avoid repetition. Employ synonyms, but make sure they fit the context appropriately. Your lexical resource is sufficient but somewhat limited; greater variety and precision in word choice could enhance your score.
grammatical range
Use a range of sentence structures, including complex sentences, to convey complex ideas clearly and effectively. Aim for accuracy in your grammar, as errors can detract from the overall comprehension of your essay. Strive for a balance between simple and complex grammatical constructions.