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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The diagram details the process of making clothes from plastic bottles. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram details the process of making clothes from plastic bottles. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#process #clothes #plastic #bottles #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The diagram depicts the
process
manufacturing
Change preposition
of manufacturing
show examples
 clothes from
platic
Correct your spelling
plastic
bottles
.
Overall
, it is noticeable that there are 13 main stages which start
from
Change preposition
with
show examples
 making
plastic
bottles
 and end with manufacturing clothes by material.In
addtion
Correct your spelling
addition
, only
Correct article usage
the
show examples
second stage
when
Add a missing verb
is when
show examples
 people transport
bottles
 and
Correct article usage
the
show examples
third
require
Correct subject-verb agreement
requires
show examples
 durable time because they carry it and prepare ,
whereas
 other processes can be
dony
Correct your spelling
done
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
 different equipment.
To begin
 with, people put
plastic
bottles
to
Change preposition
into
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 the machine, after they transported
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
in
Change preposition
to
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 the factory.
Subsequently
, the staff should pay attention to preparing all equipment to start the
process
 before sorting it.
Next
Correct article usage
The next
show examples
 phase of
this
process
 is called cutting which
require
Correct subject-verb agreement
requires
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 manual work from people when
plastic
bottles
 are put into a
plastic
 grinder and broken down into particles.
Therefore
, they
washing
Wrong verb form
wash
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 it and
also
 dry it
on
Change preposition
in
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 the sun. Following that, it boiled and
also
 stained before redeveloping into a yarn.
Subsequently
, the next
process
 can be very dangerous when they weaving it. Ultimately, it can be rolled and only after that become clothes.
However
,
this
process
repeated
Add a missing verb
is repeated
show examples
 again as soon as consumers
will
Verb problem
apply
show examples
find
bottles
 and make
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 again.
Submitted by aikumarbekarys on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, subsequently".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words process, bottles, plastic with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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