IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The maps show changes that took place in Youngsville in New Zealand over a 25 year period from 1980 to 2005.

The maps show changes that took place in Youngsville in New Zealand over a 25 year period from 1980 to 2005.
#maps #show #changes #place #youngsville #zealand #year #period
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The image compares the changes in
Youngsvillein
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Youngsville in
 Newzealand
from1980
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from 1980
 to 2005.
Overall
Linking Words
, industrialization has driven the city to
less
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a less
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 natural
envirnment
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environment
, and the need for building more factories and skyscrapers. By taking a quick look at the map, we can tell the railway has been constructed to the north. The locations of hospital, school and airport have not
change
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changed
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 over time, but most of
natural
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the natural
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 places has been diminished. Houses and
natural
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the natural
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envirnment
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environment
 has been replaced by skyscrapers,
warehouse
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warehouses
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 and factories
in
Change preposition
apply
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south
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the south
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 of River Alanah. On the north side
if
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of
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 the river, new
recreatinal
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recreational
 activities
has
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have
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 been built
such
Linking Words
 as the Stadium. There are two new parking spots in the south and west of the stadium
which
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and
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 one of them is near the lake.
Also
Linking Words
, by cutting the trees around the lake down, a new space for other
actibities
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activities
 like swimming and sailing has been provided.
Submitted by negarhosseini_78 on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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