IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Human activities are contributing to climate change. What extend do you agree or disagree?

#activities #climate #change
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The topic of
change
Use synonyms
 in wheater
seaons
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seasons
season
 is one
stronlgy
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strongly
 debated these days.
While
Linking Words
 some people
belive
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believe
show examples
 that human activities play a
role
Use synonyms
 in these changes others think that they
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
. I will first look at arguments in favour
of
Change preposition
apply
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before turning to those against. In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
essay,
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i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will elaborate
why
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on why
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i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 think our activities do not
contrubute
Correct your spelling
contribute
 to
climate
Use synonyms
change
Use synonyms
. Season
change
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 is one issue
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
contradict
Correct subject-verb agreement
contradicts
show examples
alot
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a lot
 about. Because
climate
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 changes are related to nature, it is harsh to blame human activities
on
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for
show examples
 its shift.
While
Linking Words
 other groups agree to the fact that smoking cars
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
 to air pollution that makes
change
Use synonyms
 in the ecosystem,
this
Linking Words
 reason
if
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
 of less impact. For
in stance
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instance
show examples
, nowadays the world is that there
plenty
Add a missing verb
are plenty
show examples
 of electric cars leading to
less
Correct quantifier usage
fewer
show examples
 smoking cars. Farmers
on the other hand
Linking Words
 play a key
role
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 in factors for
climate
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change
Use synonyms
. Ways to clear bushes by agricultural professionals using fire is a key point
although
Linking Words
 others accept violenting rules in line with
climate
Use synonyms
change
Use synonyms
 adds to the list.
Beacuse
Correct your spelling
Because
 these fires produces a lot of fire, huge smoke is
then
Linking Words
 made rising to the
skys
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skies
sky
where
Correct word choice
which
show examples
 scientist
belive
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believe
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they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
play a key
role
Use synonyms
 in evaporation. In
coclusion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
,
i
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I
show examples
 strongly disagree that humans play a
role
Use synonyms
 in the shift of
climate
Use synonyms
 as
this
Linking Words
 is mainly
due to
Linking Words
 nature and natural
change
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
 smoke issues
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 a concern,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 take it as a minimal lead to these changes.
Submitted by sisalt100 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay lacks logical structure and coherence. The introduction and conclusion are unclear and inadequately presented. The main points are unsupported and lack development.
task achievement
The essay fails to fully and adequately address the task. The ideas are not comprehensive and lack clarity. It also lacks relevant specific examples to support the arguments.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • climate change
  • global warming
  • greenhouse gases
  • fossil fuels
  • deforestation
  • industrial processes
  • carbon footprint
  • sustainable practices
  • renewable energy sources
  • mitigating
What to do next:
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