Your manager has asked you to arrange a party for a colleague leaving the company. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter  suggest a suitable date and time for the party  recommend a venue  propose the food and entertainment options that should be available.

#manager #party #colleague #company #date #time #venue #food #entertainment #options

Dear Mr Andrew, I want to inform you again about

Winda

Change noun form

Winda's

show examples

farewell party. I think it would be good if we make it

Change preposition

apply

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this

Friday, November 15

start

Wrong verb form

starting

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

7pm

until

Correct word choice

and

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finish

Wrong verb form

finishing

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. I already

check

Wrong verb form

checked

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all of the team, and everyone

is agree

Wrong verb form

agreed

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. For the venue, I would recommend around

SCBD

Correct article usage

the SCBD

show examples

area. Maybe Lucy in The Sky is the suitable one

Remove the comma

apply

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because it is the nearest venue. But, as I remember, you might like

private

Correct article usage

a private

show examples

area. So, I recommend Botella Bar at Antasari, South Jakarta. It will take 15 minutes from the office. And

then

, for the food and

beverages

Add a comma

beverages,

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it would be good if we choose

all you can eat

Add a hyphen

all-you-can-eat

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and free flow. So, everyone will

happy

Add a missing verb

be happy

show examples

for

Change preposition

about

show examples

that. And for the entertainment, the venue I already mentioned held

home

Correct article usage

a home

show examples

band on that day. So, we do not

Add a missing verb

have to

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worry about it. Kindly give me advice for

this

party. Waiting for your

respond

Replace the word

response

show examples

. Sincerely, Dini

Submitted by andininatiaputri on Mon Nov 13 2023

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task achievement

Address all the tasks mentioned in the prompt to ensure completeness of the response.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that there is a clear logical progression of ideas and use appropriate linking words to connect the ideas within and between the sentences.

lexical resource

Use a wider range of vocabulary and try to avoid repetitive use of words and phrases.

grammatical range

Pay attention to sentence structure, verb tenses, and the correct use of articles to ensure accuracy in grammar.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

157 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Your manager has asked you to arrange a party for a colleague leaving the company. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter  suggest a suitable date and time for the party  recommend a venue  propose the food and entertainment options that should be available.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and joining universities. What are the advantages or disadvantages?

Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree?

Some people think that the best way to succeed in life is to get a university education, while others disagree and say that it is no longer true nowadays. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.

Many believe that living in a city offers greater benefits compared to life in the countryside. To what extent do you agree or disagree? (Write 250 words.)

Some people believe tat the activities of large multinational corporations mostly benefits the economies of developing countries. Other people take the opposite view and feel that these large multinationals are generally harmful. Discuss both views and give your opinion