IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The charts below give information on the ages of the populations of Yemen and Italy in 2000 and projections for 2050. Summarise the infotmation by selecting and reportying the main features, and make comprasions where relevant.

The charts below give information on the ages of the populations of Yemen and Italy in 2000 and projections for 2050. Summarise the infotmation by selecting and reportying the main features, and make comprasions where relevant.
#information #ages #populations #yemen #projections #summarise #infotmation #features #comprasions
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Four pie charts
demonstrates
Verb problem
provide
show examples
 us
information
Change preposition
with information
show examples
 on the ages of the populations of
Yemen
Use synonyms
 and Italy in 2000 and projections for 2050.
Firstly
Linking Words
, we can see that
Yemen
Use synonyms
's
population
Use synonyms
 in
2000
Change the article
the 2000
show examples
 year were mostly from 0-14 aged
kids
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 is
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
50,1% of
all
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
the
population
Use synonyms
. 15-59 years old people make up 46,3% of the country's
population
Use synonyms
. 60+ aged persons
stays
Change the verb form
stay
show examples
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 third place with 3,6% of the country's
population
Use synonyms
.
Prognosis
Correct article usage
The prognosis
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 2050
about
Change preposition
for
show examples
Yemen
Use synonyms
's
population
Use synonyms
 looks different
than
Change preposition
from than
show examples
 statistics in 2000. Most changes between 15-59 aged and 0-14 aged
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
. Adult persons would compose the vast majority. There is a big difference between
Yemen
Use synonyms
 and Italy's
population
Use synonyms
value
Fix the agreement mistake
values
show examples
. In 2000 origin country of lasagna
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 inhabited by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
15-59 aged folk. It was
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
61,6% of the total
population
Use synonyms
 of
nation
Add an article
the nation
show examples
.
Kids
Use synonyms
 between 0 and 14 were 14,3% of the total amount and older
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 were between
kids
Use synonyms
 and adults with 24,1%. Projections for 2050 in Italy
doesn't
Correct subject-verb agreement
don't
show examples
 look similar to
2000
Change the article
the 2000
show examples
 year.
Kids
Use synonyms
 will keep the
last
Linking Words
 position in
chart
Add an article
the chart
show examples
, but old persons will come closer to adult folk with their 42,3% versus 46,2%.
Submitted by kamashzhazira on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 78%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words yemen, population, kids with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: