Some people think that supermarkets and manufacturers should reduce the amount of packaging materials. Others believe that it is the customer's responsibility to avoid buying with too much packaging. Discuss both ideas and give your opinion

#people #supermarkets #manufacturers #amount #materials #customer #responsibility

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It is believed that excessive packaging should be diminished by the suppliers

whereas

Linking Words

others contend that the consumer’s role in

this

Linking Words

problem is more decisive. Both views will be discussed and I endorse that the former view is more persuasive than the latter.

To begin

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with, there are some reasons why the customers should have a strong responsibility for

decrease

Add an article

the decrease

a decrease

show examples

in over packaging. For one thing, individual

responds

Replace the word

responses

show examples

can affect the entire

trends

Fix the agreement mistake

trend

show examples

and they are

also

Linking Words

subjects of feasible actions. To be specific, if they reduce their consumption of exaggerated packaging products,

such

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as fruits with plastic bags or unnecessary decorations, the supply and provision of these materials

Change the verb form

are

show examples

reduced. In spite of the

reason

Fix the agreement mistake

reasons

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mentioned above, I

am support

Change the verb form

support

show examples

the notion that providers,

such

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as supermarkets and manufacturers, should show more active attitudes in order to unravel

this

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matter.

Firstly

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, they can directly pack the commodities, selling simply packed products.

Therefore

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, the fundamental resolution draws upon them.

For example

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, manufacturers can revise how to encase the cookies,

thus

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individually wrapped cookies

Change preposition

show examples

vinyl can be packed only

Change preposition

show examples

paper

box

Fix the agreement mistake

boxes

show examples

. Another reason in

favor

Change the spelling

favour

show examples

this

Linking Words

view is that the suppliers should need to streamline the inordinate packaging process. They tend to add superfluous

decoration

Fix the agreement mistake

decorations

show examples

so as to draw

interest

Add an article

the interest

show examples

of consumers.

However

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

is because most of them,

such

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as undue embellishment and bubble wrap, are disposable products, squandering the resources. In a nutshell,

although

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some people argue that consumers have to take action to reduce

over packaging

Add a hyphen

over-packaging

show examples

, the

supplyers

Correct your spelling

suppliers

can more contribute to

this

Linking Words

issue.

Submitted by moonmond15 on Tue Nov 14 2023

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Coherence and Cohesion

The introduction lacks a clear restatement of the question and a clear indication of the writer's position. Moreover, the conclusion is hasty and does not summarize the main points effectively. Ensure that the introduction and conclusion clearly address the task and provide a concise overview of the writer's viewpoint.

Task Achievement

The essay addresses the task to some extent, but it lacks depth and development of ideas. More specific examples and a more balanced discussion of both views are needed to improve the score. Try to provide a more comprehensive and nuanced discussion of both perspectives.

Lexical Resource

The lexical resource shows variety and range of vocabulary. However, there are instances of imprecise and awkward word choices. Additionally, the essay lacks clear and consistent use of linking words and cohesive devices. To improve, aim for more precise and appropriate word choices and enhance the use of cohesive devices for better coherence.

Grammatical Range

The essay demonstrates effective control of a range of complex structures, but there are frequent errors in sentence structure and word usage. The errors sometimes hinder communication and affect clarity. Aim for more accurate and precise use of grammar to convey ideas clearly and effectively.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

259 words

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Some people think that supermarkets and manufacturers should reduce the amount of packaging materials. Others believe that it is the customer's responsibility to avoid buying with too much packaging. Discuss both ideas and give your opinion

Include an introduction and conclusion

Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that physical strength is important for success in sport, while other people think that mental strength is more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Parents should spend more time with their children helping them with their homework. Do you agree or disagree?