Science has long been a driving force behind human progress, and its potential to improve people’s lives is undeniable. In this essay, I will argue that the most important aim of science should indeed be to enhance the quality of human life. By exploring the numerous advancements and contributions made by science across various fields, it becomes evident that the pursuit of knowledge for the betterment of humanity should be prioritized.
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One significant area where science has demonstrated its capacity to improve lives is in the field of healthcare. Medical advancements,
such
as vaccines, antibiotics, and surgical techniques, have significantly reduced mortality rates and increased life expectancy. Through scientific research, diseases that were once considered incurable or fatal have been conquered, offering hope and improved quality of life for countless individuals.
Furthermore
, science has brought about remarkable advancements in communication and technology, leading to enhanced convenience and connectivity. For instance
, the Internet, a product of scientific innovation, has revolutionized the way we access information, communicate, and conduct business. It has opened up avenues for education, bridging gaps between individuals and cultures. The rapid development of smartphones and other devices has empowered people by providing easy access to information, services, and social networks, thereby improving their daily lives.
In conclusion, science possesses tremendous potential to enhance people’s lives in various domains. The continuous pursuit of scientific knowledge has yielded breakthroughs in healthcare, technology, and environmental preservation. By prioritizing the application of scientific discoveries for the betterment of humanity, we can build a world that is
healthier, more connected, and more sustainable.Submitted by jothyliu on
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coherence cohesion
While your essay provides clear main points, it could further benefit from a more structured approach by connecting ideas more cohesively and using linking devices effectively.
task achievement
Your response aptly addresses the task, presenting a clear position throughout the essay. To improve, ensure that all paragraphs are well-developed and contribute to the argument with relevant examples.
lexical resource
Increase the range of vocabulary used to better express nuances, and avoid repetition of certain words or phrases. Utilizing synonyms and less common expressions can showcase a richer lexical resource.
grammatical range
Demonstrate a wider range of grammar structures to enhance the complexity of your writing. Include more complex sentence types and vary your use of tenses and voice to exhibit grammatical proficiency.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite