Some people say free time activities for children should be organized by parents. Others say that children should be free to choose what they do in their free time. Discuss both views and give your opinion. You should write at least 250 words.
Nowadays, Many people argue that
the
Correct article usage
apply
children's
should be given Change noun form
children
freedom
to choose their free Add an article
the freedom
time
activity
. I firmly believe Fix the agreement mistake
activities
with
Change preposition
in
this
argument.
On the one hand , there are many advantages of permitting children
to choose their free time
activities
. Firstly
, it makes children
feel special. Children
can play any sports
of their wish with their group and playing with Fix the agreement mistake
sport
the
peers enhances their mental strength. Change the word
their
As a result
, it helps in children
's overall
growth. Secondly
, performing activities
of their wish helps in inculcating societal values in children
. For instance
, In Australia, a study was conducted by testing the IQ levels of children
who play games
of their wish and the children
who play games
of their parent's wish. It was found that the children
who played games
of their own wish had more IQ than rest
of the Correct article usage
the rest
children
.
On the other hand
, there are also
many disadvantages of children
choosing their own free time
activities
. Aggression,
is one of the major problem which most of Remove the comma
apply
such
children
faces. Children
whose parents choose their leisure activities
are more polite, whereas
, children
who choose their own leisure activity are more aggressive both towards the game as well as
in real life. In a
research in Remove the article
apply
U.K.
in 2019, it was found that Correct article usage
the U.K.
children
whose parents organized their free time
games
had more
balanced life as compared to the Correct article usage
a more
children
who chose their own free time
games
. It implies that parent's
organizing the free Change noun form
parents
time
activity is more beneficial in long
term.
In conclusion, Correct article usage
the long
Children
should be permitted to perform activities
of their own wish but under Parent's supervision. Parents should guide children
about which activities
to perform and which not to perform.Submitted by jayeshnain03 on
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Task Achievement
Develop a clear position throughout your response. Your essay occasionally contradicts itself which can confuse the reader about your stance.
Task Achievement
Enhance the clarity of your argument by avoiding contradictions and by more clearly outlining both views before stating your opinion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Increase the range of cohesive devices used to improve the flow of the essay. Aim for variety and appropriate use rather than repeating the same connectors.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use paragraphing to structure your essay coherently, presenting each main point in a new paragraph and developing it thoroughly before moving on to the next point.