The chart below show the main reasons for study among students of different age groups and the amount of support they received from employers

The chart below show the main reasons for study among students of different age groups and the amount of support they received from employers
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The graph shows the main reasons for
study
Use synonyms
in
students
Use synonyms
of different
age
Use synonyms
groups, and how much support they receive from their employers. The
age
Use synonyms
group ranges from under 26 to over 49.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
in the younger
age
Use synonyms
groups tend to
study
Use synonyms
for
career
Add an article
a career
show examples
.
Conversely
Linking Words
,
student
Add an article
a student
show examples
in the older
age
Use synonyms
group
tend
Change the verb form
tends
show examples
to
study
Use synonyms
according to
Linking Words
their interest. Interestingly, the support that they receive from employers
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
more when they are still young and already very old. The percentage of
students
Use synonyms
that
study
Use synonyms
for
career
Correct article usage
a career
show examples
decreases as they get older: accounting for 80
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
for
students
Use synonyms
under 26
years
Use synonyms
old; 70
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
for
students
Use synonyms
between 26 and 29; 55
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
for those between 30 and 39
years
Use synonyms
old; 40
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
for those between 40 and 49
years
Use synonyms
old; and 20
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
for those over 49
years
Use synonyms
old respectively.
However
Linking Words
, the percentage of
working
Add a hyphen
working-age
show examples
age
Use synonyms
people that
study
Use synonyms
for interest continues to increase as they get older from only 10
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
for
students
Use synonyms
under 26 to 70
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
for employees over 49
years
Use synonyms
old. For support that employers give
tend
Correct subject-verb agreement
tends
show examples
to be more for employees under 26
years
Use synonyms
old and workers over 49
years
Use synonyms
old, accounting for 65 and 45
percent
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
order.
This
Linking Words
is most likely
due to
Linking Words
the
age
Use synonyms
group under 26 still being able to
study
Use synonyms
more until they can perform well at work, and giving the ones over 49 a newer mindset that
also
Linking Words
gives them more ideas to better manage the workplace.
Submitted by dondollaraus on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Vocabulary: Replace the words study, students, age, percent, years with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Lifelong learning
  • Professional development
  • Adult education
  • Career advancement
  • Personal enrichment
  • Academic pursuits
  • Upskilling
  • Reskilling
  • Educational attainment
  • Tuition reimbursement
  • Flexible work arrangements
  • Work-study balance
  • Financial assistance
  • Professional growth
  • Study leave
  • Employee retention
  • Workforce development
  • Time management
  • Self-improvement
  • Motivational factors
What to do next:
Look at other essays: