The diagrams below show changes that have taken place in the Sawry District neighbourhood since 1920. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagrams below show changes that have taken place in the Sawry District neighbourhood since 1920.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The two maps illustrate the changes in the same neighbourhood in the Sawry District in the
last
century.
Overall
, the Tulebug Bros building
got
Verb problem
was
show examples
replaced with
Yang
Correct article usage
the Yang
show examples
office.
Additionally
, the primary
school
expanded to be larger than the old
school
.
Furthermore
, the whole neighbourhood faced a significant
grow
Replace the word
growth
show examples
in apartments, houses and shops.
To begin
with,
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the north
side
of Oak Avenue, the Yang office complex replaced the large factory Tulebug Bros in the west area.
Moreover
, there is a new bridge that crosses the Elmwood
river
Capitalize word
River
show examples
connected with the same road from Oak Avenue.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
south
Add an article
the south
show examples
side
of Oak Avenue, there is
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
major
changes
Change the noun form
change
show examples
happened
such
as the Lonoco Petrol station and the new Prestwich primary
school
that is
located
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the east
side
of Miller's Lake.
Additionally
,
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
new two apartments
along with
a new shop were built
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the north
side
of the primary
school
.
Submitted by ibrakh80 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "additionally".
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words school, side with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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