Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like Science and Technology are more important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #history #school #subjects #today’s #world #science #technology

There are controversial perspectives heating up a debate over the essentials of

history

While

some people hold a strong view that one of the most significant school

subjects

history

, the opposite side makes a statement that

history

is not as crucial as

science

and

technology

currently.

While

each opinion has its own redeeming features, I would contend that it is optimal to combine both mentioned elements. Without a shadow of a doubt, it is essential for students to absorb historical knowledge at their schools.

Because the

Correct word choice

The

show examples

main reason is that all citizens should know about their

history

, culture and tradition.

For example

, in Vietnam, all students who get access to tertiary education, have a firm grasp of

history

about some glorious victories like Vietnamese ancestors fought against the Americans from 1956 to 1972.

Hence

history

plays

such

a paramount important role in

schools

Change the noun form

school

show examples

education nowadays.

While

the significance of

history

subjects

is widely acknowledged, it is unfair if that of

science

and

technology

is ignored.

Well

Add the punctuation

Well,

show examples

the first thing I should mention is that it is pivotal for people to absorb knowledge of scientific and

technology

subjects

at school.

This

is probably because

science

is deeply interwoven with our lives every day of the year and from the moment we wake up, all day long, and through the night.

In specific

Rephrase

Specifically

show examples

, we need electricity to power our computers,

smartphones

Correct word choice

and smartphones

show examples

and keep the lights on.

Thus

, it is advisable for people to learn those

subjects

schools

Fix the agreement mistake

school

show examples

. In conclusion,

subjects

such

history

science

and

technology

should be put priority on in

this

day and age.

Submitted by hominhtrang995 on Fri Nov 24 2023

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task achievement

Ensure that your introduction clearly presents the topic and your thesis, giving a brief outline of the views you will discuss.

task achievement

Develop each paragraph with a clear main idea and provide specific examples to support your arguments. Abstract examples, such as the ones about Vietnamese history and everyday science, need to be more detailed and directly related to the prompt.

coherence cohesion

Use a range of cohesive devices effectively to help structure your arguments and link ideas, Be mindful of using these devices to avoid repetition or redundancy.

coherence cohesion

Organize your essay with clear paragraphs, each dedicated to a particular point of view or aspect of the argument. Consistency in paragraph structure aids in coherence.

task achievement

Your conclusion should encapsulate the key points made throughout the essay and reflect back on the thesis, providing a decisive opinion or summary.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

266 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cultural heritage
Historical perspective
Analytical skills
Contextual understanding
Technological advancements
STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Mathematics)
Innovation
Interdisciplinary
Job market
Climate crisis
Cultural identity
Critical thinking
Humanities
Contemporary issues
Integration
Tech-savvy

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Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like Science and Technology are more important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Museum and Art Galleries should concentrate on work that show history and culture of their own country rather than work of the other part in the world.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

You are going to take a short holiday in Singapore and you want to rent a holiday apartment while you are there. Write to the tourist information office. In your letter: -Explain what you need. -Say when you plan to be there. -Ask for information about prices.