The line graph and pie chart below show band information on crime in the UK for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph and pie chart below show

band information on crime in the UK for the last

year. Summarise the information by

selecting and reporting the main features, and make

comparisons where relevant.
Two different graphs
such
as the line graph and pie chart illustrate the distribution of percentages of both genders and their ages in
offense
Change the spelling
offence
show examples
in the United Kingdom.
Firstly
, it is immediately noticeable that men are
consist
Correct your spelling
a consistent
show examples
minority of offenders in the UK
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
96% .
In
contrast
Add a comma
contrast,
show examples
women constitute only 4 percent.
Secondly
, looking
from
Change preposition
at
show examples
the line graph it is obvious that
since
Change preposition
in
show examples
10 years the proportions of all convictions sharply increase
untill
Correct your spelling
until
15 , from 2% to 16 by men , respectively with 0 to 5 .
Furthermore
, the high quantities of criminals between
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
and
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
are among 15 to 20 years but the percentage of men
more
Add a missing verb
is more
show examples
than 11%.
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
show examples
since 20 years the old proportion of convictions dramatically collapsed
untill
Correct your spelling
until
60
also
the male percentage
more
Add a missing verb
is more
show examples
2
Change preposition
than 2
show examples
% than
female
Correct article usage
the female
show examples
. Looking from an
overall
perspective the young generation
commit
Correct subject-verb agreement
commits
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
more crimes than the old population in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Britain .
Submitted by abdurahimov03 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: The word "graphs" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "proportions" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: