Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?.
In today's
economy
more and more Add a comma
economy,
people
are choosing to work
for themselves and be self- employed
Correct your spelling
self-employed
instead
of being an employee as they want a more flexible life -
Correct your spelling
life-work
work
balance ,but this
could lead to some obstacles which they would need to overcome in order to be successful.
Firstly
, people
who owned
their own Wrong verb form
own
business
have more Fix the agreement mistake
businesses
chance
to get choices Fix the agreement mistake
chances
rather
than Rephrase
apply
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
work
for others.This
is because when individuals work
for others ,they have to follows
their rules but if they are self - Change the verb
follow
employee
they can do their Fix the agreement mistake
employees
business
as want as they want .For example
, the owner can close their business
,can
take a break or even Verb problem
apply
can
expand their own Verb problem
apply
business
when they want at any time.Furthermore
,non- staff person are they have more time to do the
Correct article usage
apply
others
activities Change noun form
other's
others'
while
they can manage their working life
balance.
Add a hyphen
working-life
Secondly
, freelance business
people
are more high risks
taking person.Taking risks
like this
it
can cost Correct pronoun usage
apply
people
considerable
amount of money because they have to invest a lot of money Add an article
a considerable
on
their Change preposition
in
business
.Some time
it can Replace the word
Sometimes
lead to resulting
in debt and can Wrong verb form
result
also
put a lot of strain on their families or other relationship
.Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
In addition
, that kind of risks
Fix the agreement mistake
risk
are
indeed stressful because they can lose everything if they Change the verb form
is
difficulties
Add a missing verb
have difficulties
to deal
with their problems.Change the verb form
dealing
Also
it can lead to Add a comma
Also,
mentally troubled
as well.
In conclusion,individuals Replace the word
mental trouble
more
and more trying to become Add a missing verb
are more
a
Remove the article
apply
self- employment
because they can manage their working life and freedom to Correct your spelling
self-employment
work
at anytime
.Replace the word
any time
However
, they should consider about
the high Change preposition
apply
risks
as well and should prepare for that challenge how
to overcome Correct word choice
and how
with
Change preposition
apply
that
obstacles.Correct determiner usage
those
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task achievement
The essay provides a basic response to the prompts; however, there are issues with clarity and relevance. Ensure that the main ideas directly answer the question and that specific, relevant examples are included to support your points. Expand your answers with more detailed explanations and examples to show a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is apparent, but could be enhanced. Use clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph, and make sure each main point is elaborated upon with well-connected arguments and examples. Transitions between points can be smoothed out with better linking phrases and cohesive devices.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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