It is a good thing for the senior managers to have better salaries than other workers in a company or organization? To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The issue of
managers
getting better wages than those who are rated lower than them has sparked a lot of debate.
While
some think the success of a firm is based on
them
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
others think they have
less
Correct quantifier usage
fewer
show examples
pyhsical
Correct your spelling
physical
activities to do so that they can
derseve
Correct your spelling
deserve
the money
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
earn. In
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will explain why
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
believe leaders
all
Correct word choice
and all
show examples
workers must be paid the same. On the one hand,
managers
are believed to be the people key to
success
Add an article
the success
show examples
of the company. They
insure
Correct your spelling
ensure
show examples
day to day running of the company goes well.
For example
,
handing
Rephrase
when handing
show examples
out
Fix the agreement mistake
shifts
show examples
shift
Fix the agreement mistake
shifts
show examples
, if the boss makes a
shift
of people with low
knoledge
Correct your spelling
knowledge
or experience, the
shift
might not go well leading to losses for the company. In
adddition
Correct your spelling
addition
, they
also
need to keep track of how workers are behaving,
perfoming
Correct your spelling
performing
and cooperating during shifts.
Therefore
, they carry huge risks on their back, keeping track of progress, surely they should be credited with an extra token.
On the other hand
, they have very flexible working conditions.
Managers
tend to work a few
days
that
Correct word choice
than
show examples
those on a lower level.
For Instance
, at Inpost Lublin, out of the 6 working
days
, they would be asked on
shift
3 times. On top of that, all their off and leave
days
are paid for
hence
those
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
on
production
Correct article usage
the production
show examples
side
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
get paid hourly without
also
Rephrase
apply
show examples
wages if they can not come to the
shift
. It is better to pay
lucratively
Rephrase
apply
show examples
a worker on a
six day
Add a hyphen
six-day
show examples
shift
. In conclusion,
managers
holds
Change the verb form
hold
show examples
the key to business growth but the number of
days
they work are fewer to make them deserve a better salary than others. I firmly disagree
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
the fact that they should earn higher.
Submitted by sisalt100 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
The essay provides a basic structure but lacks a clear and logical progression of ideas. The writer should aim to create clear paragraphs, each with a single main idea supported by specific examples. The introduction and conclusion are crucial for summarizing the arguments and stating the writer's position clearly.
task achievement
The response to the task is incomplete because it does not fully address all parts of the question. The writer needs to fully develop their argument, presenting a more balanced view with nuanced reasoning and comprehensive examples relevant to the topic. A clear thesis statement is necessary to convey the main idea effectively.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • competitive edge
  • remuneration
  • corporate hierarchy
  • job performance
  • executive compensation
  • organizational growth
  • responsibility load
  • workplace morale
  • income disparity
  • budget constraints
What to do next:
Look at other essays: