IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

The bar chart below shows the numbers of men and women attending various evening courses at an adult education centre in the year 2009. The pie chart gives information about the ages of these course participants. Write a report for a university, lecturer describing the information shown below. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the numbers of men and women attending various evening courses at an adult education centre in the year 2009. The pie chart gives information about the ages of these course participants. Write a report for a university, lecturer describing the information shown below. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#bar #numbers #men #women #courses #adult #education #centre #year #information #ages #course #participants #report #university #lecturer #summarise #features #comparisons
Nowadays, many people attend
a
Correct article usage
apply
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various
of
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apply
show examples
evening courses at an adult education centre.
According to
 the
bae
Correct your spelling
bar
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 chart, 42% of the participants were over 50 years old, 26% were between 40 to 49, 16% were between 30 to 39, 11% were between 20 to 29,
only
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and only
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 5% were aged under 20. The
order
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more
show examples
 people
are
Verb problem
have
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 the higher
probability
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the probability
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 of taking
this
 course.
Bsesides
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Besides
, most of the
women
 like to join language
class
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classes
show examples
, but most of them do not want to participate
sculpture
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in sculpture
show examples
class
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classes
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.
Inaddition
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In addition
, most of the men want to attend painting
class
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classes
show examples
. Compare the
differencesbetween
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differences between
difference between
mn
Correct your spelling
men
show examples
 and
women
 in the choice of
crouses
Correct your spelling
courses
. Men like to join
sculpure
Correct your spelling
sculpture
than
Correct quantifier usage
more than
show examples
women
, but
women
 are more motivated to attend language drama painting classes than men.
Submitted by asllchkied on

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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words women with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
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