There are many reasons that can motivate a person to stay working for the same company. Some believe that money is the main reason. Do you agree or disagree? What are some other reasons why people may stay?

#person #company #believe #money #reason #people

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In our multicultural world, residents are turning out to be

morre

Correct your spelling

inquisitive about the former times of their domiciles to a greater extent. The root issues of the mentioned craze and

variety

Correct article usage

a variety

show examples

of methods for individuals to appropriate

this

information will be hashed out in

this

essay. Residents’ motivation to reach a decision in ascertaining

further

about the historical background of their accommodation

emerge

Correct subject-verb agreement

emerges

show examples

from

the

Change the word

their

show examples

curiosity

themselves

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

. It satisfied a desire

in intriguing

Change preposition

to intrigue

show examples

about the dwelling’s ex-host or basically its past.

Moreover

, comprehending its bygone era

enhance

Correct subject-verb agreement

enhances

show examples

sense

Add an article

the sense

a sense

show examples

of belonging,

understanding

Correct word choice

and understanding

show examples

and the connection is linked as well. As if

that is

not enough, carrying out

investigation

Correct article usage

an investigation

show examples

Change preposition

into

show examples

the obsoleteness of the residence

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

not only

increase

Correct subject-verb agreement

increases

show examples

the property values but

also

to acknowledge

Change the verb form

acknowledges

show examples

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

its conditions. Having a handle on the prior learning thoroughly

also

grow

Correct subject-verb agreement

grows

show examples

a capacity to perceive its

actually

Change the word

actual

show examples

financial worth.

Furthermore

, individuals tend to be apprehensive about the house’s status

that is

initiated from preceding events.

Such

fettles

are including

Wrong verb form

include

show examples

criminals, accidents, social vices or if it is being haunted. So as to

fulfill

Change the spelling

fulfil

show examples

the inquisitiveness aroused, it is able to apply many typical methods.

Such

approaches are inquiring the long-time residents who may archive stories and anecdotes about the property.

Thus

, in case the house or flat

are have

Wrong verb form

has

show examples

not been bought yet, the optimal

methods

Fix the agreement mistake

method

show examples

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

doing some

researches

Fix the agreement mistake

research

show examples

from the local corporation or the real estate agent. Exploration from the internet is an ideal way as well. In conclusion, curiosity and the desire to connect with the past are the main possible reasons why people spend time delving into the former era of their homes. To discover

solution

Fix the agreement mistake

solutions

show examples

, they possess the capacity to claim knowledge from the neighbourhoods and the government apartment.

Submitted by jakelong16091994 on Mon Nov 27 2023

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task achievement

The essay contains some irrelevant details and deviates from the central topic of why people stay working for the same company, focusing instead on why residents are curious about the history of their homes. This shows a significant misunderstanding of the question topic and results in a low score for task achievement. An IELTS essay should directly address all parts of the question prompt.

coherence cohesion

Your essay lacks clear logical structure and the progression of ideas is somewhat difficult to follow. You should structure your essay in a way that clearly introduces the topic, develops and supports each main point in its own paragraph, and concludes the discussion effectively. Using paragraphs properly and ensuring a logical flow will increase coherence and cohesion, which is essential in IELTS essays.

coherence cohesion

Main points should be supported with specific and relevant examples or explanations. The examples given in your essay are vague and do not contribute significantly to the points being made. To enhance this, ensure every main point is demonstrated with a clear, specific, and relevant example or a detailed explanation.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
24
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

291 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

fulfillment
employee retention
professional development
telecommuting
competitive salary
health benefits
retirement plans
supportive management
workplace satisfaction
loyalty
job security
employee turnover
personal values
career ladder
workplace dynamics
loyal to an employer

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There are many reasons that can motivate a person to stay working for the same company. Some believe that money is the main reason. Do you agree or disagree? What are some other reasons why people may stay?

Your opinion

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to thei main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

Young people spend less of their free time with their family nowadays. What are the reasons for this? Are there more negative or positive sides to this trend?

Nowadays, many people with families leave their country to work abroad. Do you think the benefits of this trend outweigh the disadvantages for the families?