You want to sell your laptop. You think a friend of yours might like to to buy it from you. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: Explain why you are selling the laptop Discribe the laptop Suggest a date when your friend can come and see it

Dear
lisa
Change the capitalization
Lisa
show examples
, I am writing
this
letter in
regards
Correct subject-verb agreement
regard
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a
Change preposition
to a
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laptop , which
i
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I
show examples
want to give
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
to you at a reasonable price. As
i
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I
show examples
already told you that
i
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I
show examples
have got an enrollment letter for my tertiary study in university , in that
case
Add the comma(s)
case,
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excessive amount of money is
nedeed
Correct your spelling
needed
for paying
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to pay
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the fee and for other mandatory expenses.
As a result
,
i
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I
show examples
i
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
have to sell it , which
i
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I
show examples
got
last
month by spending a lot of currency.
This
is
mac
Correct your spelling
a
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book air
Correct your spelling
Macbook Air
pro
Capitalize word
Pro
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and
i
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I
show examples
got it from
Correct article usage
the apple
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apple
Capitalize word
Apple
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store
as well as
available in grey colour.
Apart from
this
, it has a good storage capacity, 500
gb
Correct your spelling
GB
RAM, fantabulous display quality
as well
as
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
maximum
batter
Correct your spelling
battery
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saver. So, you can visit
at
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apply
show examples
my place on 16
dec
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Dec
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because on that day
i
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I
show examples
have
holiday
Add an article
a holiday
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from my work . please let me know if
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
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suits
to
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apply
show examples
you.
i
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I
show examples
would be happy to hang out with you. Best regards, RIZA
Submitted by rupindernagra73 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph presents a clear and distinct idea or point. The letter should include an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion each with their own purpose.
coherence cohesion
The logical flow between ideas and paragraphs could be improved for better readability. Use connecting phrases to introduce topics smoothly.
task achievement
The response addresses all parts of the task, but more details and development of each point would provide a more complete and satisfying answer.
task achievement
The tone is informal which is appropriate for writing to a friend. However, there is inconsistency in tone and some phrases are overly formal. Aim for a consistent level of formality throughout.
coherence cohesion
Double-check for errors in punctuation and capitalization throughout the letter. Start sentences with capital letters and use proper punctuation marks.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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