Some people think that keeping pets is good for children while others think it is dangerous and unhealthy. Which opinion do you agree with? Discuss both options and give examples.
Nowadays every
home
has at least one pet
. It argues that having pets
at home
is beneficial for kids
. While
others think that, it is harmful and not a healthy option. I agree that keeping pets
is unhealthy and it causes many problems to kids
. This
essay will discuss both these views and explain my opinions in the ensuing paragraphs.
On the one hand, there have been various problems arising due to
having a pet
at home
. It may cause different health issues in kids
. Firstly
, the hairs and dust of animals
leads to allergy problem. The bird dust or hairs of cats and dogs fly in the atmosphere and anyone who inhales those can have an allergy. For example
, a study conducted in a local village shows that kids
who are allergic to some kind of dust have a pet
in their homes. Secondly
, the waste of an animal is dangerous and if anyone consumes it will lead to serious illness. Infants and toddlers do not understand the difference between good and bad products. They may touch Correct article usage
the wastes
wastes
of Fix the agreement mistake
waste
animals
if they see anything on the ground. There are chances of pets
waste
the ground. Wrong verb form
wasting
As a result
, children may get ill.
On the other hand
, having pets
at home
has some advantages too. Kids
get attached to them and they protect kids
from strangers, especially dogs who do this
job very well. Moreover
, from childhood onwards kids
understand the value of relationships if they have animals
at home
. For instance
, according to
the Northern University of The Pas, people who have domestic animals
at home
are very friendly and they value their relationship with other individuals.
To sum up
, keeping a pet
is good for people as it helps to understand the bond between people. However
, the consequences that it causes are higher than the benefits. Hence
, in my perspective, it is better to say no to animals
until kids
are grown to know the difference between what is good and bad.Submitted by rinuthomasmathew07 on
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task achievement
Ensure that your introduction more accurately paraphrases the task prompt, and clearly state your main argument. Your introduction does not accurately reflect the task requirements, and it needs a clearer thesis statement expressing your viewpoint, and a preview of the points you will discuss.
coherence and cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices to link your ideas effectively. Your essay lacks variety in its use of cohesive devices, resorting to simple conjunctions such as 'firstly' and 'secondly,' which can make the essay seem simplistic. Try to use a wider range of devices to enhance the flow of your essay.
task achievement
Develop your main points with specific supporting details and examples. While you have provided some examples, they are not always clear or fully developed. Make sure that each paragraph has a clear main idea, and use examples and details that clearly support that idea.
task achievement
The conclusion should concisely summarize the main points discussed in the essay without introducing new information. Your conclusion repeats your thesis but does not fully encapsulate the main points made in the body paragraphs nor reflects a balanced discussion as required by the task.