You are going to another country to study. You would like to do a part-time job while you are studying, so you want to ask your friend who lives there for some help. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter : Give details of your study plan Explain why you want to take up the part time job Suggest how your friend could help you find a job

Hello Preet, I hope you are in radiant health and best of spirits.I am thrilled to share the news that I am coming to Canada next month.
To begin
with, I got selected
an
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for an
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Animation course at the University of British Columbia. As you are aware from my college days , animation interests me . I am excited to start my journey. I have already booked the flight tickets.It is basically a
one year
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one-year
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course and classes will be 3 days a week from 9am to 3 PM. I have a lot of spare time to do
part time
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part-time
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job and make money. Since
,
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apply
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study
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a study
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loan is taken by me ,I have to repay it in
next
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the next
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2 years.I
will
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would
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be glad
,
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apply
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if you could suggest
me
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to me
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some
part time
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part-time
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jobs
.
Furthermore
, you know international students have to pay the next
semester
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semester's
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fees and I
dont
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don't
want to be a burden on my parents,as they have already spent so much on me. As you
are
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have been
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in
Canda
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Canada
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since
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for
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last
Correct article usage
the last
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4 years , please suggest if there is any website to register for
jobs
, it would be helpful.Before I leave India, I will start applying for
jobs
. I have
an
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apply
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expertise in doing
jobs
in grocery stores , I will catch up easily there.I would be thankful to you. I am excited to meet you in
canada
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Canada
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and study in my favourite country. See you soon. Best regards. Pulkit
Submitted by rajparul86 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear central theme and avoid mixing multiple ideas. Structure your letter with an introduction, body paragraphs addressing each bullet point separately, and a conclusion.
logical structure
Work on establishing a more logical structure by introducing your study plans and intentions earlier in the letter, and then explaining the need for a part-time job, followed by a request for assistance in finding employment.
greeting and closing
Use a polite and appropriate greeting and closing in your letter. For instance, it is generally advised to avoid overly colloquial expressions in a formal letter.
task achievement
Ensure you address all components of the task, but also stay focused on each one separately. It is advisable to elaborate a little more on the type of part-time job desired and why it is important to you, besides the financial aspect.
suitable writing tone
Maintain an appropriate tone throughout the letter, which should be respectful and formal, aligning with the purpose of the letter. Avoid overly casual language and contractions where possible.

Structure your letter

A letter needs to be written using a proper format, including the following:

  • A greeting (Dear sir/madam, Dear John, Dear Mr. Smith)
  • The main body (consisting of paragraphs for each part of the letter)
  • A closing (Yours sincerely, Yours faithfully, Best wishes, Kind regards, Love)

When writing a letter as part of the IELTS General Training Writing Task 1, it is important to include the bullet points presented to you in the question.

All three bullet points need to be presented. And remember that some bullet points contain more than one element. So, make sure to watch for ‘and’ and plurals.

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