IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

3.What key criteria does your target company use in their recruitment process?

#criteria #target #company #recruitment #process
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One key criterion in the recruitment process that HSBC prioritizes is the ability to problem-solve.
This
 is because in the fast-moving financial industry, especially, in an international company like HSBC, employees need to possess strong problem-solving skills to face challenges. HSBC seeks people who can address complex problems and who
could
Wrong verb form
can
show examples
 provide effective solutions. Since the needs and perspectives of consumers can change rapidly. Addressing problems and ensuring solutions for clients is one of the most important responsibilities that employees need to know. In the recruitment process, candidates are asked to do an online test, where various skills are assessed, and problem-solving is a skill that will be tested.
Also
, people should be able to think creatively and propose innovative solutions, and
this
 might be assessed through real case studies.
Submitted by elenazheng1211 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay should have a clear and logical structure with an introduction that sets the context, body paragraphs that delve into the details, and a conclusion that summarizes the key points. The presence of an identifiable conclusion was lacking in this essay.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that main points are well supported by concrete examples or evidence. While you mentioned an online test and case studies, providing more detailed examples or explaining how these assess problem-solving skills would greatly strengthen the essay.
task achievement
While the response is focused on the criterion of problem-solving skills, you should aim to provide a more comprehensive answer that covers multiple aspects of the recruitment process. The question asks for key criteria in plural form, indicating the need for more than one example. Thus, the response is not fully complete.
task achievement
The ideas presented should be expanded upon for clarity and depth. Explore how problem-solving is applied in various situations within HSBC, giving the reader a clearer and more comprehensive understanding of its importance in the recruitment process.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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