IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

write at least 180 words you live in a room in college which you share with another student . however, there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college . in the letter , describe the situation explain your problems and why it is difficult to work say what kind of accommodation you would prefer begin your letter as follows: Dear sir or madam

#room #college #student #arrangement #work #accommodation #officer #situation #sir #madam
Dear
madam
Capitalize word
Madam
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, I am writing
this
 letter right now to describe my situation and I hope to find a solution for me. I live in a room with my colleague at university , I
don't
Verb problem
am not
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 satisfied
for
Change preposition
with
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this
 accommodation for several reasons:
Firstly
, my peer is
kindly
Change the word
kind
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 and
much
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
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friendly ,
however
Add a comma
however,
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 she is unregular ,
while
 I want to sleep early to get up early she
Correct subject-verb agreement
wants
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want
Add the particle
want to
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 be
unsleep
Correct your spelling
unsleeped
,
also
Correct word choice
and also
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 to keep the light on ,
this
 a one of our disagreements.
Secondly
, she
all
Add a missing verb
has all
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time
Correct your spelling
the
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opens
Wrong verb form
open
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a music
Remove the article
music
a piece of music
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 and songs ,
for
Correct word choice
and for
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this
 reason I can't be
care
Replace the word
careful
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 and regular
for
Change preposition
in
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 my
study
Fix the agreement mistake
studies
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.
Consequently
, I want to
require from
Verb problem
request
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 you to change my room , I prefer
to
Correct pronoun usage
you to
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 give me
room
Correct article usage
a room
show examples
 alone without anyone with me . Thank you. Best wishes Oula
Submitted by noor23.hamza23 on

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coherence cohesion
It is important to maintain a clear logical structure throughout the letter, including a proper introduction, development of points, and a conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Include appropriate greetings and closings to frame the letter in a respectful and formal tone.
coherence cohesion
Stick to one idea per paragraph and use paragraphing to enhance readability and organization.
task achievement
Make sure to fully address all parts of the task with relevant details to meet the requirements of the prompt.
task achievement
Use a tone that is polite and formal, suitable for the context of writing to an authority figure.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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